Rehearsal dinner cunumdrum

Lauren19.

I'm in a bit of a quandry. My FI and I are paying for the wedding on our own, and his family is paying for the rehearsal dinner. He has a small family and his parents expect the rehearsal dinner to be somewhat small as well.

For the rehearsal dinner our immediate families include (my side) my mom, dad, sister, brother-in-law, two brothers and one other sister and (his side) mom, dad, brother, sister, brother-in-law, nice and nephew. Including us, that brings us to 16.
His only cousin will be a reader, so we're also inviting her, her husband, and her parents (FI's only aunt and uncle). This brings us up to 20.

My goddaughter (cousin's daughter, age 12) will also be a reader, so It makes sense for her to be there. The dilemna is inviting her means we (probably?) also have to invite her parents and four brothers. So we just jumped from 20 to 27, and five of those extras are kids.

I could invite my goddaughter and not the rest of her family, but her mom (my cousin) is like a daughter to my mom and it'd be weird to have everyone there but them.

Any advice?

Thank you!!

nichimaha

We're having issues deciding who to invite to the Rehearsal and then the Rehearsal Dinner as well... We have a couple out of town attendants (so their spouses will probably be at the Rehearsal, because the spouses wouldn't have anything to do during the Rehearsal).  However, my FI's brothers have chosen to not be in the wedding because they don't want to be ushers because "it degrades them" to not be groomsmen. They don't make the effort to spend time with us, or get a hold of us to even try to keep in touch.  So my question is- do we invite them, and their Dad to the Dinner (they won't be at the Rehearsal with the people who actually want to be there)?