Destination Bacherlorette Party... Bride is being a Diva... HELP!

divasmaidofhonor

Thank you all for your response!

LoveMuffins

No is not a four letter word.

you can't speak for the other BMs but you say to her, "I love you, but i don't have the finances for a week long trip to Mexico. I also don't have the money for the hair and make up and mani-pedis. I can do my own hair and make-up in whatever style you would like, and my own nails in whatever color you would like."

you absolutely do not have to suck it up. she's being a terrible friend, she should have asked for your budget before assigning a dress, and if she's requiring hair and make-up then SHE's the one who is supposed to be paying for it. a bachlorette party is supposed to be a girls NIGHT out. not a girls WEEK.

if you send her over her to TK she'll get the idea pretty quickly.

Allycat11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_destination-bacherlorette-party-bride-being-diva?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:39c4f303-2d80-4289-a5e2-e9a3e986fbddPost:063a49a6-98a5-4d4d-963e-10b543054f9d">Re: Destination Bacherlorette Party... Bride is being a Diva... HELP!</a>:
[QUOTE]No is not a four letter word. you can't speak for the other BMs but you say to her, "I love you, but i don't have the finances for a week long trip to Mexico. I also don't have the money for the hair and make up and mani-pedis. I can do my own hair and make-up in whatever style you would like, and my own nails in whatever color you would like." you absolutely do not have to suck it up. she's being a terrible friend, she should have asked for your budget before assigning a dress, and if she's requiring hair and make-up then SHE's the one who is supposed to be paying for it. a bachlorette party is supposed to be a girls NIGHT out. not a girls WEEK. if you send her over her to TK she'll get the idea pretty quickly.
Posted by LoveMuffins[/QUOTE]

Ditto.  She is being completely unreasonable and not a very good friend right now.  Sounds like she needs a good old slap of reality.

saric83

If trying to rationalize with this girl doesn't work, just keep telling her that it's too far away to start making plans for any of these reasons:

- More airfare options won't be out until it's much closer. 
- It's a good idea to wait until this year's hurricane season is over to make sure that wherever you want to book is still in the same condition. 
- Picking dates now would be a bad idea in case any of the people get different jobs and aren't guaranteed those dates off and/or can't ask until it's closer

Then hopefully, when it gets closer, you can all re-addess the issue in a year or so. If she keeps bringing it up, just tell her that as her MOH, you'll work with the BM's to plan something great for her that can work for everyone and drop it!  Repeat as many times as necessary.  : )  Good luck!!

dnstephens

I was in a similar situation and can speak from experience that not sticking up for yourself will only make things worse in the long-run. I didn't, spent about $4,000 for everything (bachelorette party in Vegas, wedding in Mexico, etc.) and ended up resenting my friend after it was all said and done. Her wedding ultimately caused our friendship to end. It has also made me much more mindful of how I am acting as I am currently planning my own wedding. I am paying for as much as I can for my bridesmaids and have been very low-key and grateful for any showers or parties I've been thrown. Your friend is being ridiculous with her expectations. PLEASE do not let yourself get pressured into anything you are not comfortable with!

tonya83

Wow, this bride is being so rude! First of all, it sounds as if she is planning her own b-party? Is she the one who suggested Vegas and Mexico? It is not up to her to plan this party, and it is certainly not up to her to ask you to drop thousands of dollars on celebrating her wedding. I would just be completely honest with her, and just tell her that you are not able to drop that kind of money for all of these wedding related activities. If she doesn't understand, then she is not a true friend!