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Surprise Bridal Shower with guests not invited to the wedding: HELP!

LouisianaLady10LouisianaLady10 member
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in Pre-wedding Parties
So, I have an issue. I found out that my MOH invited a bunch of people to a "surprise" bridal shower of mine that aren't invited to the wedding. Another bridesmaid told me about it because she felt it necessary for me to know that the MOH was doing this without my consent.

My question is, how do I handle this? Invitations apparently already went out for the surprise shower, and the shower is next weekend, so I can't really do anything about it now. Do I mention something at the shower about being sorry that I can't afford all the people to be at my wedding? I know only wedding guests are supposed to be invited to showers and stuff, but apparently my MOH is a rude idiot. It's a nice gesture because I'm having a fairly small wedding, but I don't want all these people to think I'm being gift-grabby when I didn't know this was going on.
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Re: Surprise Bridal Shower with guests not invited to the wedding: HELP!

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    NatandIsaacNatandIsaac
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    That's a crummy situation, but it's not your fault at all. If I were one of the slighted shower guests, then I might judge/resent the shower host, but certainly  not you.
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    banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If your MOH had the guest list then I'd echo Retread.  Thank her profusely after the shower but let her know that she did potentially put  you in an awkward place.

    All you can really do at this point is act VERY surprised to see those guests.
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    LouisianaLady10LouisianaLady10 member
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    edited December 2011
    Thanks for responding ladies. I'm so mad about the whole situation. What she did was go through facebook and send messages to friends of ours from high school, and even some mutual acquaintances (BM told me this is how she got in touch with the people). I don't know if I should tell her how annoyed I am now, or wait until after the shower. I don't want to cause drama between the MOH and BM that told me about the surprise. I guess I'll just wait until after the shower to explain to the MOH how grateful I am for the shower, but how rude it is to invite people to the shower when she KNOWS I have a smaller guest list for the wedding.
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    NOLAbridealmostNOLAbridealmost member
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    edited December 2011
    Man, I can't help but feel like the other BM should have had your back on this.  Why didn't she say something to the MOH before the invites went out?  I guess she may not have known until it was too late.

    Still, that sucks. I am sorry.  Good luck. Act surprised. I wouldn't say anything to MOH though.  It's water under the bridge now, and I am sure that she meant well. 
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    GeauxTigers17GeauxTigers17 member
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    edited December 2011
    Definitely act surprised. If it's clear you didn't "know" about the shower to the guests, I have a hard time thinking any reasonable person would fault you for it. 

    I'm really sorry she did this to you - what a crappy situation. 
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    dori2406dori2406 member
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    edited December 2011
    I'd def act suprised and then after the party tell her you're in a possibly awkward situation now.  She probably was just trying to throw a nice shower for you... don't get too mad.
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    banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Ditto Stage!
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