Pre-wedding Parties

Bachelor Party - groom pays for own hotel?

My fiance was under the impression his 20 friends chipped in for his bach party at a hotel/casino in upstate NY. He thought he was putting his card down for incidentals but was charged 200 bucks for the weekend. Shouldnt he have been told he had to pay for his own room? This was a complete surpise b/c he was left off of the planning emails.

I thought the 20 guys would have chipped in for his hotel room - it would have been 10 bucks a person. I feel like this is a mistake b/c they would have/told him about the cost up front. Doesnt the Bachelor NOT pay for the night?

Re: Bachelor Party - groom pays for own hotel?

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    LoveMuffinsLoveMuffins member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I mean, I think that if he wasn't involved in the planning, telling him that he has to pay $200 when he didn't know he was going to have to pay OR have a say in the planning is pretty rude. On the other hand, I'm not sure what he can do about it if the weekend is already past. If it's in the future if I were him I would just email his guys, apologize that since no one had told him that he would need to pay or what he would need to pay, that he can't afford it and suggest that they do something more affordable on his part. And also request that they tell him beforehand if he needs to pay for anything.

    But if it already happened... no, imo he shouldn't have had to pay, but I don't think there's anything to be done about it.
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    McKenna2012McKenna2012 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree they should have paid for him or let him know beforehand that everyone was paying their own way, but you can't do anything about it now.
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    edited December 2011
    They should have told your fi ahead of time what the cost would be. Do they know he  was charged for his room? I'm wondering if everyone thinks they chipped in for his expenses.

    At any rate, I don't think there's a tactful way for him to ask if they were supposed to pay for his expenses.
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    jerseydeviljerseydevil member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    That sucks.
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    edited December 2011
    They really should have paid his way since the bachelor party is supposed to be their gift to him. They could have at least filled him in if they planned otherwise. 

    Unfortunately, now that it is all done there is not tactful or polite way to deal with it. 

    If you guys are really that offended or strapped for cash you could try to mention it in a round about sort of way. For example, if any of the 20 guys are a brother, mention it to your parents (or in-laws) and see if they feel the need to interject. Or, use reverse psychology, "Hey, 'insert your FI name' had a great time, I hope you guys didn't spend to much on all that." and see if you get a reaction.

    Such a bummer really.
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