Pre-wedding Parties

Shower vs. B-Party guest list

I just found out that a "surprise" tea party shower is being planned by one of my BMs and it got me thinking about the two guest lists. I already gave a small list to another BM for my bachelorette.

Is there any etiquette against inviting people to the shower but not the B-Party? I'm not talking about older female relatives as much as female peers. The way I see it the B-Party is more VIP (since it will most likely result in some craziness that I only want a select few to see) and the shower is a little more open and tame.

Will it look gift grabby to invite friends who are my age to the shower and not the B-Party? Would you feel snubbed that you were excluded from the B-Party or would you just be happy to be included at the shower?

I have a feeling I'm going to be asked for a list very soon, so I want to have my ducks in a row.

TIA
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Re: Shower vs. B-Party guest list

  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In our circle, the only ones who attend B-parties are members of the WP, and perhaps a sibling if she's not in the party. 

    Just be sure that anyone invited to ANY prewedding event is also on the wedding guest list.  It would be terrible faux pas to include someone in a prewedding event who's not going to recieve a wedding invite.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • SarahPLizSarahPLiz member
    10000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    As long as they are on the wedding guest list, as Trix pointed out, then there is no snub involved. FWIW, I've been to MANY wedding showers, and not one single B-party.
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  • zaneopalzaneopal member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Like trix said, as far as I've ever heard, the bachelorette party has always just been bridal party and namely sisters, if they aren't in the party.

  • AmandaK2010AmandaK2010 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am having very different crowds at my showers and my bachelorette party.  Both of my showers are out of town for most of my friends, so the people that will be invited are my extended family, family friends, church friends, and the wedding party.   On the other hand, I was in a sorority, so I have plenty of friends that are dying to go all our for a bachelorette party.  That is where I can invite my crazy, wild, and totally awesome friends. 
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