Bridal shower & bachelorette/lingerie party on same day

laurprez

I moved out of state shortly after getting engaged.  I will be having my bridal shower in FL, and would also like to have the bachelorette (possibly slash lingerie) party on the same day.  I thought this would be a great idea - killing two birds with one stone.  This way, cousins/friends who will travel for the shower will already be in town and can also come to the bachelorette party.  Not to mention, I would also not have to travel for another separate party.

Well, I got some unsolicited advice....from someone who did not agree with this.  Mind you, this is someone who will not be invited to the bachelorette party.  Besides the points I mentioned above, I also feel that since only the girls that are closest to me will be invited to the bachelorette party, they wouldn't mind attending two events in one day for me.  It was suggested by this person that I have my bachelorette party over the Christmas holidays, which I don't want to do because important people that I would like to attend will be out of town.

What is everyone's thoughts?  Is it okay for me to have both in one day?

twilight.rose

Are you hosting your own shower/b-party? That's a rather large breech of etiquette if you are.

It should really be the parties' hosts' decision(s) as to whether or not the bridal shower and bachelorette party are held on the same day.

laurprez

It was the host of the bachelorette party's decision, not mine.

banana468

If that's what the hostesses want to do then go with it.

Yes, it's a lot to have the shower and bachelorette in one day.  It takes an entire day out of the guests involved in both so some may not like it or be able to make it.

BUT, it also uses just that one day and if they're events close to each other and requiring overall less travel from the guests, it can work.

I attended a shower/bachelorette like this and while it used my entire day, it was fine.

twilight.rose

Ditto banana. As long as it's the hostess's choice, it's fine.

vm_andrews

I would also skip the lingerie part, but I think having the shower and bachelorette party on the same day would be fine. Why not do a brunch shower so that people have plenty of time to rest and change before the b-party?

laurprez

I had already been thinking the bridal shower could start around 11 am, then the b-party could start at 7 or 8 pm..  And the lingerie shower part of the b-party is still up in the air.  I will most likely remove that aspect because I'm uncomfortable with people having to bring a second gift. 

Thanks everyone.

mysticl

It does seem to make sense to have them the same day.  However, what about those shower guests that aren't invited to the b-party?  It could get akward if people at the shower are talking about the party later that night and some of the guests didn't get invites.

trix1223

My DD had her b-party on a Saturday and her shower on the following Sunday afternoon.  It worked well because all of her WP was OOT, and they all were able to arrange for one weekend off from work to attend.

However, having TWO gift giving events in one day seems excessive to me.  The shower followed by the lingerie party is, IMO, too much.  Skip the lingerie party and do something else for the b-party. 

SuMmErKuTiE

I think having them on the same day is a great idea especially if most of the guest list is OOT this way they don't have to travel twice and can make it to both events.

amandaandkyle

There is currently talk amongst my MOH to do this same thing for me this spring (I am the one who is OOT), though it is family who it talking about hosting the shower... But they are discussing working together and having it all in the same weekend.  So I think it's a wonderful idea!

vickiloew

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_bridal-shower-bachelorettelingerie-party-same-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:6913102d-0e15-46e6-8639-6c5e674ef0b4Post:d4f88e3d-10b3-4d7d-8366-39bc94c739e4">Re: Bridal shower & bachelorette/lingerie party on same day</a>:
[QUOTE]I think that's a lot to ask of the guests. They're being asked to provide two gifts. I'd consider canceling the lingerie part of the bachelorette for that reason. The bachelorette party itself is supposed to be the gift anyway.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

I agree with this.  I don't think it's a big deal to have both the shower and bachelorette party the same day but don't expect people to bring two separate gifts.  Leave the lingerie party out.

vickiloew

I'm actually attending a shower and bachelorette on the same day in a few weeks.  The shower is from 1:00-4:00 and we are all just sticking around at the host's house to party all night for the b-party.

jmkapel

I've had two occurences with other weddings having both in the same day. It can be done, but it can cause extra stress. We had a bridesmaid with her flight delayed for 5 hours. As long as everything is very well planned I think it is possible, although not the most ideal situation. But I understand the dilemma, especially with an out-of-town situation.