Pre-wedding Parties

What to register for for the bridal shower?

My godmother has graciously offered to throw me a shower.
I think it's really nice, but I don't like that the point of the party is to bring me gifts.  I would much rather say on the invites not to bring gifts.  But unfortunately, I'm  been recommend (really told) by my host to register. I live in my parents basement right now (we are both grad students trying to save money) so I really don't need anything or have space for it.

The only thing I could think of registering for are wedding shoes, costume jewlery for the wedding, bikinis for my honeymoon. Is this appropriate for a bridal shower registry?

Re: What to register for for the bridal shower?

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    twilight.rosetwilight.rose member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You can decline a shower if you want. That's perfectly acceptable.

    If, however, you do accept the shower, you really do need a registry. Personally, I would find it odd to discover the bride had registered for bikinis, etc. instead of household items. Is there nothing you and your FI could upgrade, put to use when you get your own place, etc.?

    Furthermore, having at least a small registry is a good idea as you move forward in your wedding plans. Some people will always prefer to give physical gifts instead of cash, and it's helpful to your guests to have a registry to shop from. If there is really nothing you want to register for, I think your best option is to decline the offer of a shower.
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    edited December 2011
    Ditto twilight.  And I definitely agree that regardless of what you decide about the shower, you should have a small registry of household items for your wedding guests that want to get you physical gifts.  You can include nontraditional stuff in my opinion, like camping gear, books, movies, games, although I would find bikinis and jewelry--things just for the bride, not the couple--a little odd.  

    You can ask your godmother if she'd be willing to throw you a bridal luncheon.  If you include the word "shower," it basically means gifts, but if you call it something else, people will be less likely to bring stuff, although I'm sure some people will anyway.  
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    SuMmErKuTiESuMmErKuTiE member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think since you live at home that's all the more reason to have a traditional registry. So that when you and your FI do move into your first place together you'll have the stuff you need. It's very hard and expensive to start from scratch, and that's why bridal showers are so popular, it's to help the couple get started. You'd need everything from dishes, silverware, pots and pans, appliances, bed linens, pillows, towels, bathroom accessories, etc..

    I lived on my own for years before I got married, and DH and I lived together for about a year before the wedding and we had plenty of stuff, but none of it really matched or was that nice. So we registered for upgrades of everything and stuff we still needed. It was so nice to receive a new dish set, nice towels, nicer sheets, a bunch of appliances we still needed, etc..

    But ditto pp's.. you can always graciously decline the offer of a shower. They're not mandatory, but if someone is willing to host one for you, you would definitely benefit from the experience and it's a nice time to spend with the ladies in your family and circle of friends before the big day.
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    bluedaisy2001bluedaisy2001 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    One tradition that I thought was kind of cute was a recipe shower.  Everyone brings their favourite recipe on a nice recipe card and later the host makes them all into a cookbook for the bride.
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    edited December 2011
    Register for things that you would like when you do move out of your parents basement.  If you have to store them in the attic for a few years, then fine.  It will help you out when you do decide to move out.
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    edited December 2011

    Agree PP: create a registry and put stuff into storage so when you start your home together you will have nice stuff.

    Or, decline a shower and ask for a "luncheon" instead. Beware some people may bring gifts anyway.

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