When to have a bridal shower

gower2be

So my MOH wants to throw a bridal shower. Problem is she is leaving April of next year to go live on base down south. How long before the wedding is a safe time to throw a shower? Should we just can the idea? She won't be back until about a week before the wedding.

quotequeen

IMO, showers should be within 3 months of the wedding, barring exceptional circumstances, which do not include your MOH moving out of town.  If YOU were going to be living on the base far away from everybody that might be a reason to have it earlier.  Your MOH doesn't have to be the one to throw the shower, so perhaps somebody else will offer to do it since she can't.

loop0406

I think showers should be done 2-3 months before wedding. The MOH does not necessarily need to host it. Perhaps the BMs can host it

heyimbren

PPs are right. But I do know some people do have early showers in the case of family being unable to make it. If she isn't leaving until April, I don't see a problem with having a shower then. But she also doesn't need to throw you one or be at your shower.

frenchy730

I think it's odd for showers to take place over 2-3 months before the wedding is scheduled.  If your MOH can't do it, she can't do it.  Perhaps someone else will step up and organize it.  If not, please keep in mind showers are not mandatory.

[Deleted User]

I think 2-3 months in advance is fine. If your special circumstances warrant a bit sooner, that is okay. I would do it sooner than later as a week prior to the wedding would be too crazy IMO.

gower2be

I know she doesn't have to and I keep telling her that but she is insisting. She thinks she owes me it

I mean I know its should be 2-3 months before the wedding but on top of it I have family from out of town that would like to come but they don't to drive all the way with occassions so close (just found that out) Ugh I dunno maybe I'll suggest she talk to my bridesmaid about it, but then again I don't want to sound rude by asking her to give it up and sound rude because it's like I'm putting my other bestie up to it.

I would just feel really bad not having her there, shes like my sister. I was her MOH and I was there for her big to dos. I thought about having webcam feed but that might just hurt both our feelings more. Ugh Idunno. I've heard its a no and I've heard its abnormal but make an exception and I've had someone say to me that not everyone has the ability follow pre wedding rules to a T.

Thanks ladies for the input.

PenelopeSnuz

If she really wants to do it, let her do it.  Who cares if it is a bit early?  Isn't it most important that the people who matter are there? 

I am having 3 showers.....my MOH is throwing one, my FI's aunties are throwing another, and my FMIL's friends are throwing one.  They are going to be in 3 consecutive months (March, April, May), with my bachelorette party in June.  I am so tired of people saying it is "rude" to have a shower more than 6 weeks out.  Who makes up these rules?

gower2be

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_bridal-shower-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:975e8a1e-38a2-4385-ac57-0ea7692168bbPost:c3441190-e9b4-4eb4-8ada-5ba434fbcd80">Re: When to have a bridal shower</a>:
[QUOTE]If she really wants to do it, let her do it.  Who cares if it is a bit early?  Isn't it most important that the people who matter are there?  I am having 3 showers.....my MOH is throwing one, my FI's aunties are throwing another, and my FMIL's friends are throwing one.  They are going to be in 3 consecutive months (March, April, May), with my bachelorette party in June. <strong> I am so tired of people saying it is "rude" to have a shower more than 6 weeks out.  Who makes up these rules?</strong>
Posted by PenelopeSnuz[/QUOTE]
Ive been to bridal showers 3 months in advance and never thought "This woman is greedy because she didn't wait until 6 weeks" I didn't even know there was a rule.

heyimbren

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_bridal-shower-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:975e8a1e-38a2-4385-ac57-0ea7692168bbPost:c3441190-e9b4-4eb4-8ada-5ba434fbcd80">Re: When to have a bridal shower</a>:
[QUOTE]If she really wants to do it, let her do it.  Who cares if it is a bit early?  Isn't it most important that the people who matter are there?  I am having 3 showers.....my MOH is throwing one, my FI's aunties are throwing another, and my FMIL's friends are throwing one.  They are going to be in 3 consecutive months (March, April, May), with my bachelorette party in June. <strong> I am so tired of people saying it is "rude" to have a shower more than 6 weeks out.</strong>  Who makes up these rules?
Posted by PenelopeSnuz[/QUOTE]

NOBODY that posted here said it was rude to have a shower earlier than 6 weeks out. All they did was answer the OP's question: when are showers typically held?
And that's the answer. Nobody once said it was rude. It isn't a "rule" exactly either-more of a guideline. I don't understand why anyone would want to have a bridal shower 6 months before the wedding (unless there are extenuating circumstances that would make it more feasible), but 6 weeks out seems to be a reasonable guideline.

Kristin789

>> I am so tired of people saying it is "rude" to have a shower more than 6 weeks out. 

It's not rude.  It's presumptuous and risky.
In the case of a wedding/bridal shower, the shower is held within the 6-week window in case something happens to the bride/group/immediate families of the bride or groom/grandparents/etc. and the wedding has to be postponed or cancelled.
In the case of a baby shower, the shower is held within the 6-week window in case something happens to the baby, the mother, or the father, or someone close to the baby's mother and father.