Bittersweet Shower

als2112

I know this sounds wrong, but I'm kind of upset about my shower.  I'm so excited to have one, and really thankful for my bridesmaids who have put it together.  But it's bittersweet because I'm really dissapointed in the people that "can't" make it.   Don't get me wrong, I knew there would be some people who couldn't make it , but it seems like more than I expected can't come. I know it's not because they don't love me, and I'm trying not to be resentful, but I would try really hard to attend any of their special events and I honestly would expect them to do the same.  

Any tips on how to handle this? 

ejheart

Are these people your very close friends? If so, do you have any idea why they aren't able to attend?

I think my level of resentment would definitely depend on those two answers.

redheadtmk

Do these people have to travel? What are their reasons for not attending? A shower is not nearly as big of a deal as the wedding so I would not expect attendance or be disappointed at no shows. People have lives and other things they would rather do. I guess I dont get the disappointment because I am pretty sure I will not be having one. All my friends and family are scattered across the country and there are not enough of them in one place (that are invited to the wedding) to make it worthwhile. Parties are nice, but not mandatory. I guess just try to focus on the people who can make, enjoy the day, and look forward to seeing everyone at your wedding.

OBX2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_bittersweet-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:98db869d-84d6-4cbe-a1c2-f45f86a1695aPost:a4c4ee6a-2c2c-477f-9ddb-c57fa9a5db56">Bittersweet Shower</a>:
[QUOTE]I know this sounds wrong, but I'm kind of upset about my shower.  I'm so excited to have one, and really thankful for my bridesmaids who have put it together.  But it's bittersweet because I'm really dissapointed in the people that "can't" make it.   Don't get me wrong, I knew there would be some people who couldn't make it , but it seems like more than I expected can't come. I know it's not because they don't love me, and I'm trying not to be resentful, but I would try really hard to attend any of their special events and I honestly would expect them to do the same.   Any tips on how to handle this? 
Posted by als2112[/QUOTE]

I'm sorry that some of your guests are not able to make it and I don't really know what to say to cheer you up on that one.  I would suggest to embrace the ones that are able to attend and truly enjoy yourself.  Stay focused on the big picture b/c your wedding day will be amazing and you will be surrounded by your loved ones.  I promise that when you look back on all of this, your amazing wedding will be the only thing you think of and the shower will be a thing of the past

(and this is coming from someone who's shower ended up with me crying b/c my cousin was insanely rude to my mother and then her husband felt the need to call me on the day of my shower and yell at me, as if it was somehow my fault that she was being rude in the 1st place.  So trust me when I tell you, that your wedding ceremony & reception will be the memories that you hold closest to your heart)