Pre-wedding Parties
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Rehearsal Dinner

The dinner went great! Thanks for your input everyone!
"Learn to be what you are, and learn to resign, with good grace, all that you are not." - Henry Frederick Emile

Re: Rehearsal Dinner

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    edited December 2011
    The rehearsal dinner doesn't need to be anything fancy.  My brother is having pizza, and that's totally cool.

    The only people who need to be at the RD are those involved in the wedding and their significant others, and parents.  We're inviting grandparents as well.

    For FSIL's RD, one aunt was invited as she was a reader, and there was no expectation that the others would be invited.  I'm asking my aunt to be a reader for ours, and we aren't going to invite other aunts and uncles just because we're inviting her.

    Invite immediate family, and those who are involved in the wedding, and do something basic for food - pizza, sandwiches, etc.  Nothing fancy required.

    Edit to add: the answer to who pays  for the RD is whoever volunteers paying for the RD.  If no one offers, you pay.
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    edited December 2011
    If you have a rehearsal you should have a rehearsal dinner. It can be as simple as pizza and soda in the churches social room or someone's house. There is no rule saying you have to go to a restaurant.

    You should invite anyone who is required to attend the rehearsal and their significant others. If you keep it strictly to those guests, I think your other aunts should be able to understand why the soloist aunt and reader aunt and their husbands are invited to the rehearsal and dinner.
                       
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    edited December 2011
    The RD is hosted by whomever feels up for it. Traditionally it was hosted by the parents of the groom, but most people don't bother with that anymore. The bride and groom are frequent hosts these days for a variety of reasons.

    If you do choose to host, it doesn't have to be expensive or fancy. We had ours at a local BBQ restaurant. Lots of people have pizza parties or grill burgers in their backyard. It only has to be as fancy or a laid back as you want, as long as you provide food for your guests and a place to sit while they eat.

    You can also invite whomever you want. We had the WP and their SOs, the officiant and their SO and immediate family. I do agree with your pastor that you really should include the soloists and readers and their SOs as well. Basically, anyone who has a role in your wedding and will be at the rehearsal should be invited to the RD. If you can't afford to host the entire family don't feel bad and don't feel pressured just because the soloists and/or readers are family and then you have to invite everyone. My officiant was a cousin and we didn't invite the whole family just because she was there. If you want to invite everyone, go ahead.
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    edited December 2011
    Well, are you not planning to have your readers and soloists at the REHEARSAL?  Anyone who is involved in the rehearsal needs to be invited to the RD, along with their spouses/significant others.  That does not mean you "have" to invite the rest of your mom's family if they are not a part of the wedding specifically.  You probably should, however invite your parents, siblings, and grandparents, regardless of their involvement.

    As for who pays for it, you do, unless someone else OFFERS.  It doesn't have to be fancy or expensive.  Some of my favorite RDs included a cookout with hotdogs at a park, a pizza party held in the basement of the church where the rehearsal took place, and a simple pasta dinner at someone's house.

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    OBX2011OBX2011 member
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_pays-rehearsal-dinner-should-there?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:9c31b31d-071f-448e-9f46-2fa14b044943Post:e3a4797a-f05d-43d3-93d1-ff93cf0e2016">Re: Who pays for the rehearsal dinner and who should be there?</a>:
    [QUOTE]The RD is hosted by whomever feels up for it. Traditionally it was hosted by the parents of the groom, but most people don't bother with that anymore. The bride and groom are frequent hosts these days for a variety of reasons. If you do choose to host, it doesn't have to be expensive or fancy. We had ours at a local BBQ restaurant. Lots of people have pizza parties or grill burgers in their backyard. It only has to be as fancy or a laid back as you want, as long as you provide food for your guests and a place to sit while they eat. You can also invite whomever you want. We had the WP and their SOs, the officiant and their SO and immediate family. I do agree with your pastor that you really should include the soloists and readers and their SOs as well. Basically, anyone who has a role in your wedding and will be at the rehearsal should be invited to the RD. If you can't afford to host the entire family don't feel bad and don't feel pressured just because the soloists and/or readers are family and then you have to invite everyone. My officiant was a cousin and we didn't invite the whole family just because she was there. If you want to invite everyone, go ahead.
    Posted by waltzingmatilda13[/QUOTE]

    Ok this is soooo not related to your posts but GO UNC and VCU!!!  My mom attended UNC and she has worked at VCU for like ever so those teams are close to me.  RIC is psyched b/c we have VCU and UR playing in the Sweet 16. 

     

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