Picking the date for bridal shower and bach party

mabellove2010

I'll try to be brief and concise here. My best friend and are are getting married 15 days apart and are both in eachother's weddings (mine is first). Her matron of honor has already planned the dates for both her bach. party and bridal shower based on what works for everyone (myself included). My MOH is aware of those dates....so there should be no drama with conflicting parties correct? Except, my best friend has been hounding my sister and now ME to try and square away dates for my bach. party and shower "because her summer is booking up quickly and she wants to be there." Am I crazy or is this pushy/rude? She has been planning her parties with her MOH and is overly hands on, and I am so the opposite. I feel really uncomfortable bringing this up to my MOH (sister). WHat would you do?

yoko2011

I'm presuming you're not planning your parties. She probably tihnks your sister is in the loop regardless of if the bp or other family/friends are planning something on your behalf. And you can pass this along as needed.

She is perhaps overzealous wtih good intentions in trying to reciproacate. If you're OK with her potentially missing these events then tell her the date's not been determined and the party planners will notify her. You appreciate her efforts and understand if for some reason she can't make it due to other obligations.

If you're going to pull the angry "I did all this for you, you couldn't make it to mine" vs. slightly disapointed since life happens - then I'd tell your sister x needs dates, please let her know asap. I'm not implying you are like this, but you often see posts about x didn't do y after I did x for them, etc.

Her parties may not pose conflict but that's not to say there aren't other scheduling issues. Work, other friends/family events, etc.

FWIW, my perspective comes from actually having summers where this time of that year between friends weddings, work travel, personal vacations, commingling family events, etc. the summer was completely booked or I only had one or two weekends left to juggle to ensure I didn't miss out on important events.