Pre-wedding Parties

Get someone to throw bachelor party?

I'm trying to figure out if there is any way I can get someone to throw my FH a bachelor party, as it doesn't seem that his BM is planning anything.

The long version:
We are getting married July 17.  I've already had my bachelorette party, and am having a bridal shower in a few weeks (there were unrelated to this issue reasons why MOH scheduled so early).  My FH has been increasingly upset about why I get 2 parties and he doesn't get any.  Though I know it's still a little early, I'm worried that maybe no one is planning him a bachelor party (especially if he is going to be upset about missing the experience).  We are getting married near where I grew up, which is basically a destination wedding for everyone other than my parents and their friends, so no one is going to be there until the night before.  So, my other concern is that the BM thinks they can just go out then, which is even more worrisome, not only as I don't want a hungover groom at our formal wedding, but also that there is NOTHING in the area there (it is literally in the mountains); other issue is that most of his friends, other than his BM, are where we live now (8hrs away) and I'm not sure how many are going to be able to make it to the wedding (and hence, last minute bachelor party, if one were going to take place).

I tried to send the BM's wife a casual message asking if BM needed names/contact info for friends, but didn't hear back from her.  Is there anything else I can or should do?  I feel like I really shouldn't do anything, but I'm so concerned that FH is going to be upset about it.

Anyone have any thoughts????

Re: Get someone to throw bachelor party?

  • vsgalvsgal member
    Eighth Anniversary 250 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Parties are not a given, they are a present.  Youcannot ask someone to throw a party for tell somewhen when the party can take place and neither can he.  Do not push it.  If he gets one, great.   If not, that should be fine too. 
    ROCK IS KING!!
  • duckie1905duckie1905 member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    If he doesn't have a bach party then he doesn't have one.  It is fine for him to be disappointed but you can't ask his friends to throw him a party.  Parties are gifts and are not to be requested.  

    Not to mention it is going to make you look bad if you go around to his friends and insist they throw him a bach party.

    It sucks if he doesn't have one but if you get involved it is just going to make things worse.
  • edited December 2011
    Wow!  Really?  Because I think it's sweet that you want to make sure he gets a party!  It could be awkward if you don't know his friends very well, but I feel like I know my FH's friends well enough to ask what the plans are for his party! 
    So Happily Married to the Love of my Life! Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_someone-throw-bachelor-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:b421d808-eefd-423c-a41a-88310e1d9619Post:e87e8408-8e46-4dff-8af6-f809c925794c">Re: Get someone to throw bachelor party?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Wow!  Really?  Because I think it's sweet that you want to make sure he gets a party!  It could be awkward if you don't know his friends very well, but I feel like I know my FH's friends well enough to ask what the plans are for his party! 
    Posted by kath5489[/QUOTE]

    And what if the answer is they're not planning one.  Then what will you do?  Not your party.  Not your WP.  Not your call.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • loop0406loop0406 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    It's nice that you want him to have a bachelor party but it's not up to you honestly.
  • edited December 2011
    Hmmmm...talking to all of my friends..some already married and some getting married in the near future.  We all agree that there is nothing wrong with asking his friends.  If they aren't doing a party, so be it...you can't make someone throw a party...but what if they are just "guys" and didn't even think of it?  Or like you said, didn't quite think it through...? 
    I would do about anything to help make my FH happy...so if you ask and it sparks a flame-great!  If you ask and there isn't a party, then your FH will know. 
    Just my 2cents!  Good luck to you!  Happiness and Love...
    So Happily Married to the Love of my Life! Image and video hosting by TinyPic
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards