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Was this rude?

jbenbe28jbenbe28
100 Comments
in Pre-wedding Parties
Hi- I'm standing up in a friend's wedding this September.  I attended one of her bridal showers last month.  I received an invitation to a second shower which was to be held the same time my family was visiting/staying with me from out of town.  I called the groom's sister (shower host) and left a message that I would not be able to attend and explained my reason.  The shower was yesterday and my friend sent me a text saying "are you okay?"  I responded "yes, I'm fine.  I left a message that I couldn't make it since my family was staying with me.  Did you receive my message?"  and no response.  Now, I'm worried that she's upset.  I probably should've called to tell her as well as the host but I didn't think of it at the time.  How horrible is this?  Should I reach out and apologize for not going?
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Re: Was this rude?

  • AdeleDazeemAdeleDazeem member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    You didn't do anything wrong.  If she's upset, that's her own deal.

    You told the host you couldn't make it and you had a perfectly valid reason. 

    All should be well unless your friend is a little BSC :-)

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  • EmilyEastondotcomEmilyEastondotcom
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    The hostess should have let the bride know that you did a proper RSVP. Sounds like the bride never heard that. But since you asked us, yes, I think you could have expressed your regrets ahead of time to the bride as well. That would have been nice -- but not a huge deal that you didn't. Now that you yourself have been thinking maybe you should have reached out to the bride, I would apologize for not doing so -- but not apologize for not being at the shower. And I would also call her instead of texting so she can hear your sincerity and you can get a read on how she's reacting.
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  • covejackcovejack
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Nope, not rude.  A shower invitation is just that, an invite, not a command.
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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    She shouldn't be upset because you didn't do anything wrong.
                       
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  • Hellokatie0517Hellokatie0517 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    She shouldn't have contacted you.  There's nothing rude about declining an invitation to a shower -- especially a second shower. 

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  • shannacknagshannacknag member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Nope not rude at all. In my opinion, family comes first anyways. My friends understand.
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