Gifts for the Shower and Gifts for the Wedding??

bekahjane89

I'm just curious how everyone else feels about this...

SaraAndrew2010

It's never a requirement to give a gift. 

Generally, if I attend both a shower and the wedding I will give a gift at each.  I may end up spending slightly less on the wedding gift if I already gave a gift at the shower. 

Sometimes people will spend a lot of money on one gift at the shower that also counts as the wedding gift.  For example, my sister bought us a KitchenAid mixer and gave it to me at the first shower.  That was also our wedding gift from her and I certainly didn't expect her to be giving me gifts at other showers or at the wedding.

Are you asking this as a guest?  I would tell you to give what you can afford.  If you can afford to give both a shower and wedding gift, great.  If not, I would just bring something to the shower.

bekahjane89

Thanks! I'm really just curious how other people feel about it. 
As a Bride, by no means do I expect guests to get us something for every pre-wedding party we have.
As a Guest (it seems that everyone we know is getting married right now too!) I'm big about getting them something, even if it is a small something, for every event I'm invited to, if I attend or not.
Tacky or not, I'm also one of those people that I am more generous to those I'm close to, people who I'm not as close to or less fond of who have sent me an invite to something with a million other people will probably get a smaller gift.

mikeynkrib2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_gifts-shower-gifts-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:e23f9b55-9b12-413d-8c20-e33c5b2ab9afPost:34950c6f-537f-4b21-91fb-4f3139187b8e">Re: Gifts for the Shower and Gifts for the Wedding??</a>:
[QUOTE]It's never a requirement to give a gift.  Generally, if I attend both a shower and the wedding I will give a gift at each.  I may end up spending slightly less on the wedding gift if I already gave a gift at the shower.  Sometimes people will spend a lot of money on one gift at the shower that also counts as the wedding gift.  For example, my sister bought us a KitchenAid mixer and gave it to me at the first shower.  That was also our wedding gift from her and I certainly didn't expect her to be giving me gifts at other showers or at the wedding. Are you asking this as a guest?  I would tell you to give what you can afford.  If you can afford to give both a shower and wedding gift, great.  If not, I would just bring something to the shower.
Posted by SaraAndrew2010[/QUOTE]

ditto ditto ditto!  i bought my close friend a shower gift that was way more than we would spend on a wedding gift, and just ended up combining it into a wedding/shower gift.

however, i would agree that it's probably more traditional to buy a gift for both the shower and the wedding.  but whatever you can afford is fine!

Allycat11

In my family it is very common to get a gift for the shower, typically a set of things (bathroom set, baking set, etc...) and then usually  a "flat gift" (check, cash, gift card) for the wedding. While this is the norm in my family, I would not even begin to expect this from everyone, especially not from our younger friends.

Personally, I think it is appropriate to take a gift to the shower and the wedding.  When finances are tighter it is a good idea to set a budget and divide it between the shower and the wedding. 

SuMmErKuTiE

I usually bring a gift off the wedding registry to the bridal shower and give a cash gift at the wedding. If money is tight at the time, I'll give less than usual but I can't imagine attending a shower or a wedding without a gift. 

heyimbren

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_gifts-shower-gifts-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:e23f9b55-9b12-413d-8c20-e33c5b2ab9afPost:1e167cf5-c4b6-486d-bac8-cfe4df5e1d05">Re: Gifts for the Shower and Gifts for the Wedding??</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I do something small for the shower (such as baking pans or towels) and something a big larger for the wedding, such as a setting of their china</strong>. I didn't hear of two separate gifts till I was older, though...when I was growing up, and when I married the first time, it was one gift.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

This is what I do as well. But I wouldn't say it is <u>necessary or required.</u> From what I can tell, it tends to vary by region and social circle. Some people give cash, some give a gift, some give two gifts, and others give one gift.

Krysty10

I tend to go "smaller" for the shower so that I will be able to get something really nice for the wedding.  I typically love giving books to help out the newlywed couple for the shower.  There are some great cookbooks, help with finance books, starting a new home books, and what to expect as a newlywed books!!  My favorite so far that I have given to my good friend for her bridal shower is a book called The PMS (Please Make Sense) Guide for Men.  Don't let the title fool you, it deals with a whole lot more than PMS....I loved it. (Got it on Amazon)

trix1223

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_gifts-shower-gifts-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:e23f9b55-9b12-413d-8c20-e33c5b2ab9afPost:81b444a2-3e0c-4253-a4ab-410be98e06b1">Re: Gifts for the Shower and Gifts for the Wedding??</a>:
[QUOTE]I usually bring a gift off the wedding registry to the bridal shower and give a cash gift at the wedding. If money is tight at the time, I'll give less than usual but I can't imagine attending a shower or a wedding without a gift. 
Posted by SuMmErKuTiE[/QUOTE]

ditto this.