Feeling sad about Bridal Shower attendance

GiGiSeattle

I am going to my bridal shower tomorrow and I should be looking foward to it, but instead, I am feeling sad that 70% of my friends declined the invitation. A few of them had a real excuse, but several (10+) just didn't want to drive to the friend's house where it is being held because it is 40 min-1 hour away. 

The reason I am posting this here is because I don't feel like I can tell anyone I know about this. My sisters (my bridesmaids) are coming and I mentioned how I felt to one of them and she was like, don't worry about it, I will be there and we will have fun. Which is true. I just still feel sad.

So there it is. Guess I didn't need advice as much as I needed to say how I felt. It is interesting how this process is full of so much happiness and fun, but sadness too.

banana468

Well, it's fine to feel bummed.  I felt bummed when some people didn't come to my shower.

BUT please know that driving 40 min - 1 hr is a pretty big excuse.  That's a big chunk of their day to spend in just the car. 

covejack

I agree with Banana.   I understand that you're sad, but that's asking people to spend 2 hours in the car.  Don't take it personally, and have a great time with the people that are there.

mandi921vh

I understand your sad feelings but you have to also understand that they will be spending 2 hours in their car for a party that may only be 2 hours.

afeith6658

Times have really changed since my bridal shower 12 years ago. I had no part of the planning whatsoever. Actually, I was completely surprised.

jmatthews308

It's perfectly understandable to feel sad that people can't/won't make it. They have lives and preferences too. But I think as long as there is a good crowd there for you, you should suck it up and focus on appreciating those who do come to support you.
At my shower, I almost wish people just hadn't bothered. I felt like I was putting them out. I was sad BECAUSE they were there, lol. But more so that they didn't seem to really give any gifts that we needed and didn't put any thought into their gifts. Yes, that makes me sound selfish, but $70 on several mis-matched and unnecessary gifts from Wal-Mart equals one nice gift that we needed from Bed, Bath & Beyond.
So you might even be getting the better end of the deal by some people not being willing to show up! Hey, at least they let you know!

Louisa1000

I once attended a bridal shower that was planned during finals week. It was me, the host, and the bride. I felt so awful for her. At least yours won't be that bad!

GreenEire

Out of 20 or so people that were invited to my shower, ONE person came.  So I understand how you feel.  She and I went shopping instead, so we still had a nice time.

GiGiSeattle

Thanks everyone for your nice thoughts. Ended up with 20 people and really had a great time. In fact, might not have been much fun if there were more because I wouldn't have been able to hang out with everyone as much.  Everyone was in such good moods and my friend that threw me the shower made veils for everyone to wear, which was a crack up.

The only reason I knew who was coming and who wasn't, was that I told my friends to do an evite to save money, but that turned out to be a terrible idea, since then I could see it all laid out like that. I would recommend either doing paper invites ($$) or not adding the bride to the evite.

Thanks again for your encouragement!!

Mae0606

Etiquette would be for the bridal party to host a second shower if that many guests could not make it to the first one. I would think somewhere half-way between the original party and where most people who did not wish to drive would be a good idea if they went with this. Then again- do you really want to throw a party for people who wouldnt drive a single hour for you?