Pre-wedding Parties

E-Party...Kinda Long...

Hi Ladies,

Before I start- my FI and I live in Philadelphia, my parents are 6 hours away in NY and my FIL's are 5 hours in western PA.  Our parents have never met.  I have 3 BM's, two are friends but have never met the 3rd BM.  They all live several hours away from me and each other.

The day my FI and I got engaged my mom offered to throw us an Eparty- I think she offered out of excitement because I know she HATES throwing parties.  After the first week of discussing the party with my mom I decided it was too stressful and told my her not to throw me a party (she was relieved).  We also told my MIL my mother wouldn't be throwing an Eparty. (She also seemed relieved- she kept complaining about "babysitting" grandma for the weekend in NY and she kept telling us we didn't "have to" invite his aunts and uncles etc.)

After we told my mom she didn't need to throw us an Eparty I was explaining to one my BM's the situation.  She immediately offered to throw us a party as long as  she could throw it at our house in Philly (we have a big house and my BM's all have apartments so it makes sense.) 

Anyway now we are having a hard time picking a date for the Eparty.  My BM's are all several hours away and in other weddings/working etc. 

I kinda feel like the Eparty is a lost cause/too much of a hassle.  I mean I'd love to have one, I know if my mom doesn't have to plan it she'd enjoy it too- just seems like a big pain in the butt! Because my BM's haven't all met I'm communicating between them all and I feel like I'm imposing even though it wasn't my idea to have it in the first place. 

Any advice?


Re: E-Party...Kinda Long...

  • AdeleDazeemAdeleDazeem member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Well... you could just not have an engagement party.  I only know one person in real life who had one.  You don't need one at all.

    You also don't need every single person in your wedding party to be there so you could just pick a date and whoever could make it would come.

    Or you could just have a party for the sake of having a party.  No engagement attached to the title, etc... just have a nice house party in Philly.

    EDIT: if the point of the engagement party is to have the entire bridal party meet and become friends, then I say it's not a big deal.  Let whoever is free come and don't hassle those that can't.  It's not uber important that everyone be friends with each other.  They'll all meet at the wedding and when the wedding is over, most of them will never see each again.
  • scpalmtree06scpalmtree06 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Just don't have one.  Let everyone off the hook by saying you'd rather have them concentrate on being able to attend your actual wedding, since so much travel would be involved for everyone.
  • quotequeenquotequeen member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I wouldn't ask people to drive 5-6 hours for an engagement party.
    Married 10/2/10
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