Registry and Gift Forum

Registering after living together?

We have lived together over a year now, so is it wrong to register?  Everybody has their own opinion I'm sure, please give me yours.

A bit of intro, we got engaged last weekend and today is my 3rd day being engaged.


Re: Registering after living together?

  • Congrats on being engaged.  There is nothing wrong with registering after living together.  Its just a wish list of things you want, not a command. 
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  • Its not a problem to register if you are living together. Most older aged brides/grooms not living together still already have a lot of stuff. Registries in these cases are for upgrading to nicer versions of what you already have, or adding on odds and ends. You can register for tools, recreational equipment (camping etc), board games or other things to do. Also many stores give you a discount on registry items that dont get bought so you can put some bigger items on there that you and your husband will like to buy with wedding money.
  • we've lived together for 3 years and we need stuff desperatly.
    Anniversary
  • Congratulations on the engagement!  It's not rude or inappropriate to register if you've lived together.  Often, couples that live together (or don't, but have been on living on their own) don't have matching dishes, nice sheets, enough towels, etc., and will add upgrades to their registries.  Also, in my opinion, it's not inappropriate to register for nontraditional items like camping gear as long as you have traditional stuff on there, too.  Follow the general rules for registries--having a variety of price ranges, not having excessive numbers of registries, don't put registry info in the invitation--and you'll be fine. 
  • No, not a bad idea to register. My FI and I have lived together for 2 years and really want china and crystal. Not to mention, upgrading a couple of things we already have.
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  • DH and I lived together for about 5 years before we became engaged and we registered.  There were things that was needed or wanted and many more that we wanted to upgrade.
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  • I think most people live together before they marry.  My advice is to take a clipboard and go through your house.  Make a list of everything that you need or that can be upgraded and take it with you when you register.
    Proud to be an old married hag!! image
  • SKP82SKP82 member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited April 2011
    "How long have you been married though?  It sounds like it's been awhile.  If so, it might be strange to hold a "wedding" now."

    Starburst: 2.5 years, together 5.  I figure since no one attended the first one we are good to go for an "official" one now!

    Although since we're older (25 and 28) and have DS we won't be registering for anything lol.  We'll just do the church ceremony and throw a big party."

    Quoted from The Nest


    I would think that if you're already married (and have been married for 2.5 years), you would not register. 

    Get your story straight.  Either you're married and having a vow renewal, or you just got engaged to your son's father.

    Edited for clarity.
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    "Life is not orderly. No matter how we try to make life so, right in the middle of it we die, lose a leg, fall in love, drop a jar of applesauce." - Natalie Goldberg
  • Interesting find SKP82.  I agree...no registering for second "weddings."  And in what world is 25 and 28 "older"?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_registering-after-living-together?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:d35b34a3-7268-41cc-a2d1-9a1bc700159dPost:466b8e3c-817a-4161-8155-5947dddf39b2">Registering after living together?</a>:
    [QUOTE]We have lived together over a year now, so is it wrong to register?  Everybody has their own opinion I'm sure, please give me yours. A bit of intro, we got engaged last weekend and today is my 3rd day being engaged.
    Posted by starburst2785[/QUOTE]

    Today is your 3rd day of being engaged and the most important thing on your mind is whether you can register or not?  That seems inappropriate to me.
  • Congratulations on your engagement!  My FI have lived together for about a year.  When we moved in together we each brought things we had from college and our families and friends gave us a lot of hand me down items (pots, pans, towels, etc.)  We really appreciated the hand me downs but now we're going to register for things of our own and pass the hand me downs to the next family members moving in together or going off to school :)
  • Starburst, you are really starting to bother me with all of these posts.

    Are you a troll?
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    282image Invited to celebrate!
    208image Will be Dancing the night away!
    74image Won't be having any fun
    0image are giving me a major headache

  • I think its ok to still register, as couples need upgraded items.  For me though, I'd spend a bit more money on a couple that has not lived together than I would with an already established couple, who is already living together.  I assume (incorrectly or not) the couple who has not cohabitated "needs more" because they've both been on single incomes and haven't bough household items as a couple, but I know that's not always the case.

  • SKP82SKP82 member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_registering-after-living-together?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:d35b34a3-7268-41cc-a2d1-9a1bc700159dPost:a20a3746-a563-443a-aa35-09a7c34c4261">Re: Registering after living together?</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>It is not a faux pas to register for a second wedding.</strong> A registry is a wish list that no one is required to use, and those who ask about it want to buy a gift. I didn't register because I had a repeat wedding (widowed once, divorced once prior to this) and because I'm in my forties with a fully stocked home. We told everyone who asked to just please come....and got a pile of white elephant gifts. Register. Or risk the chili pepper lamp.
    Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

    Is registering for a vow renewal a faux pas?  Because that's what this is. 

    <a href="http://community.thenest.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/51542695.aspxa" rel='nofollow'>http://community.thenest.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/51542695.aspxa</a>
    IMG_6364
    "Life is not orderly. No matter how we try to make life so, right in the middle of it we die, lose a leg, fall in love, drop a jar of applesauce." - Natalie Goldberg
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