Monetary Gifts- Acceptable Wording for Website?

Ariel02

Sorry,

I believe I asked if the wording I had made was acceptable...not if it was tacky. Thank you kindly for the detailed respones but they are not necessary. I guess I should just stick with offbeatbride.com. =( I'm not by-the-book traditional, so this site really isn't for me anyway. Have a good evening.

Avion22

Exactly what cebrady said.

It's rude to ask people to give you money istead of gifts.  If you don't need anything, then don't register  People will either realize on their own that money is an appopriate gift, or they may ask your families.  IF ASKED, your family can respond that you and your fiance are set for homewares, but are saving up for a downpayment, home repairs, or whatever.   Realize that if you don't want phsycial gifts, you should decline any offers for a bridal shower (the point of those is to "shower" you with gifts).

If there ARE a few things that you need or would like to upgrade, then make a small registry.  If it gets fulfilled, then people will revert to giving cash/gift cards or asking your family.  

As for the Chinese tradition -- if it's customary in your family, then go for it.  If it's not, then I think it's weird to expect people to give you money in red envelopes.  

jagore08

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_monetary-gifts-acceptable-wording-website?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:e10913f6-7c3a-44cd-8287-b2974a03e697Post:90895c92-d7dd-4615-8ec0-4f02b47a62c4">Monetary Gifts- Acceptable Wording for Website?</a>:
[QUOTE]Sorry, I believe I asked if the wording I had made was acceptable...not if it was tacky. Thank you kindly for the detailed respones but they are not necessary. I guess I should just stick with offbeatbride.com. =( I'm not by-the-book traditional, so this site really isn't for me anyway. Have a good evening.
Posted by Ariel02[/QUOTE]
Anyone can respond as they'd like as long as it doesn't violate the TOS agreement.  Most people here are not going to sugar coat things or pat you on the back and tell you what you want to hear.  That's a good thing because it can stop you from making an etiquette faux pas.  If you want everyone to validate every idea (especially the bad ones because you don't care for others opinions) you have then maybe the offbeat bride or another website might be your pace.

Avion22

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_monetary-gifts-acceptable-wording-website?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:e10913f6-7c3a-44cd-8287-b2974a03e697Post:90895c92-d7dd-4615-8ec0-4f02b47a62c4">Monetary Gifts- Acceptable Wording for Website?</a>:
[QUOTE]Sorry, I believe I asked if the wording I had made was acceptable...not if it was tacky. Thank you kindly for the detailed respones but they are not necessary. I guess I should just stick with offbeatbride.com. =( I'm not by-the-book traditional, so this site really isn't for me anyway. Have a good evening.
Posted by Ariel02[/QUOTE]

<div>If you thought it was acceptable, then why did you ask?   </div><div>
</div><div>We're just trying to help keep you from looking rude in front of not only your family, but also your future family. I would be mortified if my future in-laws first impression of me was as a money-grabber.   Yikes.</div><div>
</div><div>It's okay to not be "by-the-book traditional", but most of us think that there is a way to fulfil your wedding vision without offending your guests, and we're more than willing to help you figure out how to do that.   We recommended not registering and using word-of-mouth.  Unforutantely, there IS no polite way to use "wording" (on a website or anywhere else) to ask people for money instead of phsycial gifts, but we gave you good suggestions for how you can lead guests to this conclusion without asking.</div><div>
</div><div>Also, we didn't say that YOU were tacky.  We just don't like your idea, and are trying to help you come up with a better way of doing what you want to do.</div><div>
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AdeleDazeem

No matter how you word it, it doesn't make it acceptable.

Being an "offbeat bride" has absolutely NOTHING to do with it.

RebeccaB88

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_monetary-gifts-acceptable-wording-website?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:34Discussion:e10913f6-7c3a-44cd-8287-b2974a03e697Post:90895c92-d7dd-4615-8ec0-4f02b47a62c4">Monetary Gifts- Acceptable Wording for Website?</a>:
[QUOTE]Sorry, I believe I asked if the wording I had made was acceptable...not if it was tacky.Posted by Ariel02[/QUOTE]

No, it's not acceptable.  We aren't going to tell you and acceptable way to do something rude.  There is no acceptable way to beg for money.  Even the Offbeat Brides know this.

KatePlusNate04

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_monetary-gifts-acceptable-wording-website?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:e10913f6-7c3a-44cd-8287-b2974a03e697Post:90895c92-d7dd-4615-8ec0-4f02b47a62c4">Monetary Gifts- Acceptable Wording for Website?</a>:
[QUOTE]Sorry, I believe I asked if the wording I had made was acceptable...not if it was tacky. Thank you kindly for the detailed respones but they are not necessary. I guess I should just stick with offbeatbride.com. =( I'm not by-the-book traditional, so this site really isn't for me anyway. Have a good evening.
Posted by Ariel02[/QUOTE]


Being an off-beat or non-traditional bride has absolutely ZERO to do with breaking etiquette and being downright rude to your guests. I hate that you're giving other off-beat brides a bad name by implying being "off beat" gives you the right to be rude to your guests.

Simply Fated

According to offbeatbride.com FAQ: "Aren't some of the weddings you feature sort of, um, tacky? Honey, it's not just some of them — they're ALL tacky!" So... have fun over there, hun.