My FI is military, and his two boys are young (5 and 7). Unfortuantely, because of his stationing, he very rarely sees his children (he hasn't lived in the same time zone as them since the divorce, so he only sees them 4-5 times a year). He and his ex do not get along whatsoever and she frequently interferes with what little visitation he can arrange (she cut a holiday 3-day-weekend visit short to a mere 8 hours, and before he recently left for Afghanistan, while on two weeks of leave, she refused to let him see them for more than two hours total!).
My question is, does anyone have any suggestions of how to include his boys in our ceremony? I'm pretty confident their mama won't be cooperative (to allow them to attend) but I know FI and I would love to have the boys there or to somehow include them. I, especially, don't want her to EVER have room to say that FI has cut the boys out of his life or doesn't love them simply because he's started a new life with me. He loves his boys and he does his best to deal with their mama's drama while juggling what he must do for his career to provide financially for them.
Chances are they won't allowed to attend the ceremony or reception... but can anyone suggest ideas of how we can make them feel included in our union anyhow?