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need opinions....

kimp67kimp67 member
500 Comments
in Second Weddings
I know I have a while to decide this, but I'm stumped.(& I'm a worrier!)  We're going over the guest list & I'm not sure how to handle this.  For years I worked with the same group of girls.  I got kinda close to 2 of them & very close to 2 others.  I left that job last year & since then I've only talked to these 4 girls a couple of times.  I immediately put the closer of the 2 on the list, but now I'm not sure.  Should I invite all 4, or just the closer 2, or none?  The wedding is in June, so it will be 2 years since we've worked together.  I would like to invite all 4, but I'm just not sure.  Thoughts?
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Re: need opinions....

  • Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    I work "with" several women who are stationed in an office, and I work at home 100% of the time. My family is small, and I'm inviting them all plus their husbands.

    If I were in your shoes, I think you have to look at how often you see/talk to them, and whether you think of them as "close friends". I'm having family through 1st cousins, and my oldest & dearest friends. Between my fiance & myself, that's only about 80 people. We are planning on 100, so we can invite these people who I really like.

    But, in my opinion, if you invite any, you have to invite all. THEY see each other even if you don't see or talk to them regularly.
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  • right1thistimeright1thistime member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Since you don't have to decide for sure (unless your numbers are close to your min or max) for about 7 months-- why not just pay attention to how often you have contact with any of them?  If you were still working with them- I would say they needed to be invited all or none.  But if over 2 years of not working together, you see one of them 10 times, and one 3 times and the other two just once, you will realize whether they have moved from co-worker to friend.    And...as Sue said- if you really like these people, and want them there- then add them to the list.  If they don't feel like the relationship has continued- they will decline. ~Donna
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  • AbbeyS2011AbbeyS2011 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    If your guest list has enough wiggle room, and you want to invite all 4, then do so.  You could also put them on the list for now, then as you get closer and re-evaluate your guest list, decide for sure if they receive an invite.

    PS:  When I became engaged, I was stressing about inviting my boss and only co-worker in my office because of her negative attitude about my wedding.  I finally decided that I would extend her an invite when the time came to keep the workplace peace.  As it turns out, she was terminated by our company over a month ago, and we do not keep in touch, so - no invite!
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  • SueR13SueR13 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree with the poster who said to start paying attention to what your relationships really feel like. A lot would also depend upon how large (or small) you're planning on having your wedding be.
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  • nmauser82nmauser82 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    If you have room to invite them, then just invite them. An invitation is not a summons. If they can't or don't want to go then they wont. Simple as that.
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  • kimp67kimp67 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_need-opinions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:28a792ce-ca61-4a54-85d2-5fe16ab9a808Post:1102069c-05bb-4745-ae3c-f44e1b158ff4">Re: need opinions....</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you have room to invite them, then just invite them. An invitation is not a summons. If they can't or don't want to go then they wont. Simple as that.
    Posted by nmauser82[/QUOTE]

    Yeah, why am I stressing over this?  Kinda silly now that I rethink it, it's not the big deal that I'm making it in my head. 
    Thanks for all the opinions & makiing me see this is a silly "worry"
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  • thealphabridethealphabride
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I wanted to reply to this post because I invited all the people from work and now I regret it. A few ladies are coming, and all have known about this wedding since I've been engaged. Most have not RSVP'd yet even though they got the invite a month ago.

    I invited all to my shower to make it easy so they wouldn't have to do something at work and most didn't show or even bother to RSVP.
    RUDE. Now I am sorry I invited them, because there are others I could have invited.
    Moral of this story: Be careful about who you invite, you may regret it later.
    Good luck with your planning!
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