Well this is my first post here... Ive been lurking awhile.
This is my 2nd marriage and FIs first. We havent officially gotten engaged yet, we are still trying to figure out our budgets and stuff. He wants to have a pretty solid plan before we tell anyone whats going on. Understandable because we are not sure how much of a backlash we are going to get. We have been friends for over a year and a half and started dating last summer exclusively. I wanted to make sure I was over the drama with my ex... trust me there was a ton of it.
Little background. My divorce is going to actually be final June 25th. EXH has fought it for 3 years. We were only married for 5 months when he left me for another married woman and they moved into his moms house. My family was opposed to the wedding from the start thinking he treated me like crap. He was a manipulative abusive cheater who broke my spirit for a long time. He served me with divorce papers on Valentines Day as an engagement gift to his married girlfriend with his mother paying for BOTH of their divorces. Lovely family I know. Well I thought the divorce was final last year and it turns out he withdrew the divorce papers the day before it was final. So I finally sucked it up and hired my own lawyer and pushed it through. Gave EXH the option to sign or we use the prenup and I go for a fault divorce. So here I am at the end of the waiting period. Glad I found out now and not after we told everyone of our plans or worse.
So how has everyone gone about telling their families? How were the reactions. Surprisingly my family really likes him and keeps telling me how he is a keeper. I just feel weird. EXH and I were married over 3 ago. So that is far but not that far. But since then my house has burned down and everyone from my family knows how terrible he treated me and how bitter our divorce was they seem to be really accepting of N.
I also know N wants a big wedding and my best friend is so excited to plan a bridal shower and everything (she wasnt allowed in my first wedding, only EXH family was allowed). But is that against etiquette. She says no since N and I are just starting out on our own together. After the fire I moved on campus at the university I attend and he stayed with his dad until we got back on our feet to rent a place.
Sorry to ramble. Lots on my mind today. He wants to start looking at venues this weekend and Im getting nervously excited.