Second Weddings

Adult Children

I have 2 adult daughters, 22 and 29, he has a daughter 10.

The plan is for all of us to stand at the altar during the ceremony, which will be short. My girls on my side and his daughter on his side. We will also have our witnesses along with us.

It is more of a symbol to those there that we are all one now.

Should the girls walk up the aisle? Wouldn't this appear that they are sort of bridesmaids? When they are not? Should I just have the girls walk on the side of the seating area, as the witnesses (best mand and maid of honor(though mine is a man too) are planned.

So basically, everyone takes their places on either left or right of the seating area and only I, the bride, walk up the middle? (which feels selfish in a way)

Or does this all seem silly?  

Re: Adult Children

  • 2dBride2dBride member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2012
    Having the children there, but not as attendants, is nontraditional.  Having the maid of honor not processing is nontraditional.  So there isn't a traditional answer to how to do all this.  That doesn't mean that your plans are wrong--just that you will have to decide what makes sense for all of you, rather than being able to look up some "right" answer somewhere.

    We actually went in the opposite direction.  Both of my children were our attendants.  And both of them (son and daughter) processed.  But what was right for us isn't necessarily right for you.
  • My DH's daughter escorted him with his Mother. 

  • A SW bride a long time ago walked everyone to the altar holding hands.  I liked that imagery.  You could have the family sitting in the front, let the attendants process, then you process, meet your groom, then go to the seats to get your children & bring them to the altar.  ~Donna
  • We have 5 kids from 8-24 between us. His 3 will stand with him and my 2 boys will walk me down the aisle and stand with me.
    !0 year old girls definitely have opinions, if it doesn't matter to the 2 of you who stands where or who walks with you, ask her which she would prefer. My fiance's daughter is thrilled to stand with him and her brothers but some girls may rather walk with or in front of the bride.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_adult-children-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:35Discussion:51d0ba71-6c5c-455b-ad73-5feb748af6b0Post:48759daa-35d4-469b-b014-eee11ae64626">Re: Adult Children</a>:
    [QUOTE]Having the children there, but not as attendants, is nontraditional.  Having the maid of honor not processing is nontraditional. Not entirely correct.  People have gotten married with their children present for centuries without having them in the wedding party.  In fact, most people who got remarried didn't have wedding parties at all. Processionals are an optional custom, like doing readings.  They're not a tradition.
    Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]
    And what exactly would be the difference between a tradition and an optional custom?  The definition of tradition I just found was:
    <ol style="padding-left:19px;"><li class="vk_txt" style="list-style-type:decimal;">The transmission of customs or beliefs from generation to generation, or the fact of being passed on in this way.</li><li class="vk_txt" style="list-style-type:decimal;">A long-established custom or belief that has been passed on in this way.</li></ol>So traditions are customs.  And they are pretty much all optional.
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