Had destination wedding, now having home wedding 3 mos later

lbuck99

My husband and I recently did a wedding on the west coast as a destination wedding in wine country with 25 people (immediate family and couple friends).  We decided to do a reception back east with our other family and friends (including grandma who missed the "real" one) at my parents home with a tent and band for 150 people. Here we will do a first dance, cake cutting, father/mother dance, etc. Because so many people were upset they were not able to make the first wedding, we decided to do a brief ceremony at the East coast wedding for those who could not be at our first one (for 90 year old grandma especially).  I am having serious difficulty trying to decide what to include in the ceremony.  What do we call it? Its not really a renewal, more a restating of vows.  Also, do we have our flower girl and ring bearers? Do we include our 2 bridesmaids/maid of honor and 1 groomsman/best man? Do we exchange vows? I almost feel silly doing it all over again, but then people who werent at the west coast wedding say they want to see it all again. 
How do people typically do this? We did not have a religious ceremony on the west coast and will not on the east coast.  We are having a judge perform the ceremony back east.  I am just confused on outline of how it will flow.

Thanks.

handfast4me

My head is going to explode.  Someone else please take care of this, so I don't lose my mind.

Marrin713

At the risk of Hand's brains splattered all over............

If you absolutely have to do this, I'd leave all of the extras out of it - such as the bridesmaids, FG's.  Grandma is probably not interested in all that anyway.  I would keep it simple.  Hopefully everyone on the east coast knows that this is just for show and that you are already married?

blush64

I wouldn't do a ceremony. I wouldn't wear a wedding dress. I wouldn't have the attendants. I don't think people typically do this at all. They didn't miss the "real" one they missed the real one.

I mean a party is great but I wouldn't try to re-create a wedding that already happened. The people who missed it can see some pictures.

cincychick35

My brother got married in St. Lucia, just he and his wife.  Since most of our family was unable to attend, they held a reception about 3 months later to celebrate with those would couldn't be there for the wedding.
I think having a reception is perfectly fine.  If you would like to have your first dance and cut the cake...there is nothing wrong with that IMHO.
However, you are already married and having another ceremony seems rather unnecessary.
I would keep it simple and small and just hold a reception.  Wear a nice dress (not a big poofy wedding gown), no attendants.  Just have a celebration of your marriage.

shytownkelly

Having a reception after a destination wedding is quite common.  I had one 4 weeks after our wedding in Mexico. 

But it was JUST a party. 

We had food
music
beverages
cake

and socializing. 

No first dances (did that in mexico), no cake cutting - I was too busy talking with guests to be bothered... etc. 

Here's the thing - when you chose to have a Destination Wedding you run the risk of some folks not being able to attend.  If it was so very important to you to have your 90 year old granny there - then you should have had a local wedding.  

But if you REALLY think granny needs to "see" a ceremony - have your pastor or someone special do some readings and a prayer or something. 

right1thistime

You call it an "at home reception" and you do not have a ceremony.  I don't care who missed the real ceremony and is upset about it, it has been missed.  You can choose to do everything that belongs at the reception, first dance, cake cutting, bouquet toss, etc.  But I advise you not to do anything that is ceremony-esque, such as vows or a bridal party.  Why not display your wedding photos, either in an album or on a slideshow?  ~Donna

handfast4me

Thank you, ladies.  Crisis averted.  My head did not explode, which is good, because my granddaughter is coming to visit this weekend and having a headless grandma is not good. 

MikesAngie

I agree with the previous posters - Do not have another ceremony - that parts done. You can do a slide show of the pictures that were taken at your DW.  So those who couldn't attend can see how everything went. 

ginadog

With my first marriage we had a "celebration party" 4 months after we were married. 

It was just a party though - toasts, food, socializing, cake.

Didn't actually have a wedding the first time around, just went to the courthouse but no family was there to witness it since we were engaged like half a week.

rapunnzzll

So glad you ladies were around to save heads from exploding.  Some grandmas are scary no matter what, but headless ones!!!!!  Granddaughter is safe. Have a great time with her!