Second Weddings

Is Registry poor etiquette for a second wedding?

I am new this (marriage and the knot!) and trying to figure etiquette.  This is my first wedding, my fiance's second - I am comfortable with what we have, not wealthy but just no great "needs" from a registry.

To be honest our favorite things are little getaways, an overnight, nice dinner on the town and maybe updating some areas of our home that need improvement.

My wedding will be only about 60 people (mostly couples) so not like a lot of gifts anyway, is it odd to list a registry?  Is there another option that would be appropriate that would say something like for gifts we would like their creative ideas towards a certificate for a dinner, getaway or night on the town?  I want to remain classy but not sure how to handle.  - Victoria

Re: Is Registry poor etiquette for a second wedding?

  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Registery is not odd for a second wedding.  You can also register at Lowes or Home Depot as well. 

    You should not list it on your invitations - it can be mentioned if you have a wedding website or by word of mouth. 
  • Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    ITA with all the responses so far. I'm like you, my first wedding, my fiance's had 2 already, LOL.

    We have everything. We need nothing. We are not registering, but there is nothing wrong with that if that is your choice.

    My future sisters-in-law approached me about a shower, and I said "No but thank you". Explained why. We'll need a garage sale to pare down, LOL, as we are combining 2 households. 

    If you don't register for anything you risk getting the "chili pepper lamp" that is infamous.........but you will also get checks which you may ultimately want.  

    Nothing wrong with any choice you make.
  • edited December 2011
    I'd register. Once you start looking at what you have and what you don't or what could be replaced and all the cool things out there - you'll find a nice list. Many people like having a registry to go off of so they know they are getting you something you want.
  • aprils0worldaprils0world member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    My fiance' and I are getting married in October 2011.  Both of us have been married before.  We have everything we need, but we have been trying to remodel the house for 3 years now and can never finish. 

    The best website I have found is giftregistry360.com.  You get your own log in and you can just tell people to go to this website, type in the bride and/or grooms names and there you go!

    We asked for a ton of Lowe's gift cards because we really need carpet and tile.  We ripped up the flooring throughout the house and haven't been able to put anything back down.  You can also register for tools for remodeling, organizational items and the list goes on.  Good luck!

  • vgibbsvgibbs member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I appreciate people's feedback and YES I will do a registry and YES we do need items like Lowes, Bed Bath & Beyond, Home Depot, etc. the 360 site looks great as well. 

    I guess afterall, this IS my first wedding and I don't and now won't have kids - I have done MY share of buying wedding/bridal/baby shower/baby b-days gfts for others - I think I do deserve to sign up for a registry because we really can use it!Tongue out
  • edited December 2011
    I think Home Depot, Lowes, or some other home improvement store certificate would be appropriate.  Remember, it is YOUR first wedding-nothing aganst etiquette for a registry.
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I don't think a registry for a second wedding is any different (re: etiquette) than one for a first wedding.  From my perspective, the function of a registry is to help give guests an idea of what you want/need.

    We went back and forth on this and, finally, did not register.  When anyone asked, we told them their presence would be more than enough.  If they insisted, we told them a card would be great.  Most left it at that.  We received a mix of cards, cards with cash or checks and a few (very few) gifts. 

    Honestly, there were only two white elephants -- both of which have found "places of honor" for discreet display. After next year's spring cleaning, they might find new homes, we'll see. 

    There was no chili lamp and, regrettably, no leg lamp either.  

     
  • edited December 2011
    I was really hoping for a leg lamp!

    We registered, but our registry was pretty small and mostly kitchen items because we love to cook together.  My in-laws hosted a small shower, and we did receive some gifts from the registry.  I don't think having or not having a registry makes much difference in the proportion of people that give a gift/give a check/give a card. However, it will help people who want to buy a gift buy you a gift you will actually use. 
  • edited December 2011
    I had to leave almost all of my household items behind when I left my ex. FI has some items.....but we want to create a home that is ours.

    That's where the registries come in.
    "Who died and made you Dagon?" - stackeye210 I'm supposed to be falling for myself...and not falling for just any guy out there in the world.....
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_registry-poor-etiquette-second-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:6d7575e7-fe45-4db8-b48e-86375176aefdPost:e30c1505-30e9-4465-8c7c-198a177745a0">Re: Is Registry poor etiquette for a second wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I was really hoping for a leg lamp! Posted by lindaloulubbock[/QUOTE]

    I know!  H and I joked about the leg lamp for so long that I might <u>have</u> to get one for him for Christmas.  <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-innocent.gif" border="0" alt="Innocent" title="Innocent" />
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