Not so sure anymore.....

stacywideman

This is my second but first wedding.  I went to Vegas my 1st marriage and didnt plan very much other than my dress and hairstyle.  I booked a place but back out because of no help or support with planning my 1st marriage.  I am 37 & my first marriage left me broke and with bad credit.  Now in the mist of marrying my perfect partner Im quickly panicking over the wedding expenses.  I never really looked at how much we have to spend.  Well I did but did not consider details like my veil, shoes, flowers...Just the big things and the little things does add up.  I am so nervous I changed my dress to a cheaper one and now Im considering changing our rings.  All I wanted was to be happily ever married this time.  He even said, "Well we never had to do all of this."  Men..... We have so much booked already and 6mos to go.  I did a budget too but the total price and timeframe are freaking me out.....

MikesAngie

Stacy, Retread has some great points! 

One on-line jeweler that we have experience with is Blue Nile, my engagement ring any where else would have been double what my fiance paid for both my engagement ring and wedding ring.  His wedding ring was purchased there as well any where else it would have been $600.00 more!  I/We highly recommend Blue Nile. 

Another great resource if you are a DIY gal is your local craft stores.

stacywideman

Thank you so much!!!  I'm so happy that I have someone that truly loves and respect me.  Even though the details can be overwhelming I dont want to lose sight of that.

2dBride

I agree with RetreadBride.  To be married, all you need is:

*  A partner.
*  An officiant.
*  A marriage license.
*  Witnesses.

Even some of those things may be unnecessary, depending on your state.

So, when planning your wedding, look at everything that is not on that list as optional, and figure out whether it fits into your budget.  Big white dress?  Not necessary.  If it doesn't fit into your budget, you can get married in a nice dress you already own.  Seated dinner?  You can have cut back on the guest list, or serve only cake and punch.  Band or DJ?  You can have a reception without them, or can do an iPod reception.  Rings?  You can get them from Walmart or on eBay at a very low price.

The important thing is getting to the point that you are married to the person you love.  Don't get so bogged down in detail that you forget that.

Sue-n-Kevin

Welcome and congrats!

I agree with what everyone else said. Because we allowed so much time, I've been able to look everything over and decide exactly what I need, what I want, and what I can forego. In addition to ebay, use google and search the online retail sites often for things on sale.

Since you only have 6 months, maybe save additional money by eliminating some expenses in your day-to-day life that aren't necessary: things like eating out, name brand groceries (if you have an Aldi near you, you can save a LOT of money on groceries). Negotiate with your vendors that you can: if you have a caterer, see if you can alter some of the servings or menu choices to reduce the cost a bit. You can do whatever you want with those that are willing. Re-use or re-purpose things you already have. Order flowers from Costco or Sam's Club instead of using a florist. Buy a small 2 layer cake and buy a sheet cake from Costco ($16, serves 48) that is cut in the back room. We are doing all these things.

Make saving money a game and celebrate when you can sock away $50 or $100 a week until the wedding.

Good luck.

stacywideman

Thanks a million.... everyone.   I'm already thinking of cutting out some things.  Whats your thoughts on the rehearsal dinner?  Any good suggestions for bridal party gifts?

Marrin713

We did ours for under 2G's and that included 3 hour hosted bar.  We chose an off-time (Sunday evening) at a local golf course.  We had 50 people and we did heavy apps (8 different ones), the cake was provided from a bakery that the golf course does business with and while it was kinda plain by wedding cake standards, it was pretty and more important it was delish!  My best friend is very crafty and she made centerpieces for the tables and the sign in book.  We did IPod for the music, but no one even noticed!  Everyone was so busy wandering around and talking with each other that no one danced!

I did wear a "wedding dress" - it was a tea length sundress but a little fancier than a sundress.  H wore khakis and a subdued Hawaiin shirt.  It was country club casual I guess would be the term.  The hosted bar blew us away when we got the final bill. People were drinking topshelf stuff and imported beers and the cost came to just under $500 for the 3.5 hours.

You'll come up with some good ideas!

thealphabride

Another way to reduce expenses is to keep your bridal party SMALL. One or two attendants on each side is all you need.

Rehersal Dinner:Backyard bbq with brats, burgers, chips beer.

Bridal Party Gifts: My cousin make embroidered hankies for all the girls and I'm getting the guys a small gift cert. I got the gift bags at hobby lobby (50 cents each) and made beautiful name tags from the paper left over from invites.
I
'm not having menu's, made escort cards from paper left over from invites. FI designed and printed programs on inexpensive paper. We punched the tops and attached simple ribbon bows.

Favors: Jordon Almonds in tulle, I made "thank you" tags from paper left over from invites. Tied with a little gold cord, very inexpensive.

Lisa50

Welcome, Stacy!

Yes ma'am ... you've come to the right place to find multiple ways to stretch a penny (and make it cry!).  PPs are spot on.  So many of the things the "industry" tells us we need are hogwash.  I am still maneuvering compromises.  

For my FI and I, some of easy things to eliminate (or were never in consideration):
o  Rehearsal dinner. 
o  Directions/maps inserts. Reception cards.  Enclosure cards.  Custom TY cards.
o  Escort cards.  Place cards.  Menus.  Programs.  Guest book. 
o  Videography (waa ... tough one to eliminate, but cannot justify the expense!)
o  Floral centerpieces (venue provides hurricanes and candles), pomanders, flowers for mothers, etc.

There are other things I lust for and cannot give up (yet!):
o  Letterpress.  I can't help it, I lust for it!!!
o  A dress by Stephanie James Couture.  

I have 299 days until my wedding to come around and let go of these last two fantasies.  LOL!

And, in the meantime, unemployment (lost my job a year ago, lost unemployment benefits last month, not a job prospect in sight), my parents (not aging gracefully, I will have to take dad's keys away soon), my son (senior in high school, applying to Stanford, Tulane and Duke) and my fiance (cannot sell his house in this economy), will continue to keep one of my feet in reality.

But, this is the stuff life is made of.  You, I and everyone else will get it all done!

Best of luck!!

Judith233

A website that has become my best friend is overstock.com.  I bought boxes from there that were $26, handcarved from India.  Best part, they came with a second box that is smaller and fit inside.  Instant flower girl or reader gift.  Two for one.

You still have some time to shop around and wait for things to go on sale (not a lot of time, but more than some!).  Use that to your advantage.  Craft stores like Michaels give you a coupon for 40% a purchase the next week.  I have yet to pay full price.  Do I buy one item at a time?  Yes.  Is it annoying sometimes? Yes.  What makes it easy?  Thinking about all the $$ I have saved.

Check out the Budget Bride and DIY boards for more good money saving ideas.

Good Luck!!

kristend72

Lisa- I lust for letterpress, too. But keep in mind that very few of your guests do and that $$$ will be on their fridges for a while but then will go into the trash.

I talked myself into getting letterpress stationary later. Something generic (so it doesn't have to be customized). Maybe thank yous or monogrammed notecards.

For the dress... can you talk yourself into buying yourself a gorgeous all occasions dress separately? Or, I don't know how much these cost vs. what you should spend but maybe a few fab dresses you can wear on dates?

And, like everyone else said, pare back until you fit in your budget. One of the single biggest things couples fight about is money. You two need to sit down together and make budgets - living expenses for now, wedding expenses, and then a budget for after you get married. Set goals together and work together to achieve them.

singingjme

Rehearsal Dinner:  We're having a BBQ.  We're expecting people to wear shorts and t-shirts and we're making it just a regular summer evening.  But, that might even be too much for you.  It's totally an unnecessary thing to have a "dinner" for, even if you want to rehearse.  You could even do it low key and meet everyone at a pub.  just celebrate-  not a pre-paid part event thing. 

Just enjoy getting married to the man you love.  That's the real focus.  I even went to a wedding once where it was just dessert and coffee.  Guests were asked to bring dessert and send in the recipe prior-  and they gave out the recipe book as a favor.  For them, it was the perfect reception and they had it in the hall attached to the church.  We all loved it. Simple, elegant, and a celebration of love. 

These suggestions are awesome-  I totally plan on stealing some of them. 

stacywideman

Wow!!! Why is it when all hell breaks loose....people think they are alone.  Lol...I get it sooo much.  I knew of some things I could cut out, but was a little blinded by watching to many wedding shows on WE tV.....The rehearsal dinner is an absolute waste for me...I have 4 other girls in my party....my bff, my only sister, my only daughter & my niece who begged to be in my wedding and is paying for her stuff and more. Walking straight down an aisle shouldnt be that complicated. No videography for me just photographer which is my parents gift.  I can so relate to the expenses that will just have to hurt like our rings and reception.  The best part is getting everything done....chiseling away....I whine as would any other bride, but Im truly excited....

naynay1982

For my first wedding we got our rings at a department store for $200 total. Just simple plain bands. I will likely do something similar this time.

Rehearsal dinner will be a BBQ at my future in-laws house. My FI is dying to cook. He wanted to cater the wedding, but I talked him out of that and said he could do the rehearsal dinner instead.

bridal accessories like veils can be found much cheaper online than at the bridal stores. Same with shoes, go to a regular store for shoes, they don't even have to be white. you could do metalics or any color you want to go with your theme. Use your own jewelery and it can be your something old.

For bridal party gifts I will probably hit up the christmas sales for something. Don't know what yet, but might as well take advantage of the price cuts right?

Here is a tip: anytime that you add the word "wedding" or "bridal" the price jumps. A lot of times, if you take those words out and think more simply, you can get a better deal on the very same item. A guest book is just a notebook right? toasting flutes are just champagne glasses, wedding cake servers are just a spatula and knife. why pay more for something if you don't have to just because its "bridal"?

I am cutting out the guestbook, no flower girl or ring bearer, I might even leave out the bridesmaids bouquets and the boutineers and corsages and just do a bridal bouquet and groom boutineer. I might not do programs and if I do I will just print them myself at home.

Invitations kits can be purchased at office supply and craft stores. You can just print them up yourself at home and its a lot cheaper than some of the professional ones (asuming that your printer ink isn't too expensive). You can even add some ribbon or decals to dress it up.

vmmom

these are all great ideas.  Just a couple more I haven't seen yet:  For your cake - maybe consider cupcake on a tiered stand.  Some are absolutely adorable.  Gifts - vintage jewelry you can find at your local antique mall.  There are some beautiful things and you can pick out very personalized items for your gifts.