Second Weddings

Will you not have a MIL?

Technically I'll have one, but for all intents and purposes, I won't have the dreaded MIL that everyone kvetches about. When she and FFIL divorced when FI was young, she pretty much left and hasn't really looked back too much. He barely saw her then, and he hasn't spoken to her in about 6 years. It might be flameful, but that's at least one thing I don't have to deal with! As for FFIL, not so much. He lives right next door Undecided But at least the property is 5 acres, so it's not like he can peek into our windows while we're having coffee in our bathrobes.
They didn't have you where I come from...never knew the best was yet to come...

Re: Will you not have a MIL?

  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    No, I will not have a MIL.  FI's mother died when he was young.  FFIL remarried many years ago and his wife passed away in November.
  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    I will have a wonderful MIL but my FFIL passed away in November.
  • edited December 2011
    I will have a MIL and FIL.  She likes to control things and is very outspoken.  I'm learning to speak my mind around her which is hard when you are brought up to respect your elders.  It is definitely a learning process.  Seem's the more I speak my mind the closer we get.  Guess that's just one of her little quirks.  FIL is an absolute sweetheart.  They live about 5 miles away from us.  We all have a lot of fun and they have been very generous to us in the last few weeks.  We were not planning on the typical RD.  We met them for coffee and toured our venue on an afternoon after it was set for an evening wedding.  They were thrilled to see it and offered to arrange a RD.  They also gave us our wedding gift last week.  A Southern Carribean cruise in December.  So excited and grateful.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    130image Invited to dance the night away!
    92image Want to show their best moves!
    38image Have two left feet and won't be dancing!
    0image Are too embarrased to say they don't dance!

  • Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011

    I will have a future MIL...........she is the sweetest person in the world, raised FOUR boys, and she is very close to her daughters-in-law. We are all like the daughters she never had.

    The sad part is my fiance is the only one that lives near her. He currently lives about 2 miles away from her, her other sons live from 4 hrs to 10 hr drives, OR a flight away. And she's struggling right now with health issues, and I can't be there for her. We made her dinner last weekend, but she needs someone to check on her at least twice a week (she's in her 80's and had a knee replacement a couple of months ago). Fiance is dealing with his 18 y/o daughter with a baby, and it's just so stressful!

    Anyway, enough about me, LOL.


    Good luck with YOUR inlaws!

  • edited December 2011
    I won't.  FI and I have talked about this a lot.  His Mom passed away in '92.  I am very sorry that I won't get to know her...  However, I had such a godawful MIL the first time, I can't say I'll miss the drama.  I mean, FI's Mom doesn't sound like she'd have been a drama queen like my xMIL, but still.  I do not mean this to sound disrespectful in any way to my FI's Mom.  Hope it makes sense anyway.
    Anniversary
  • 2dBride2dBride member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    NotFroofy is not in contact with her family.  I might get one passive-aggressive e-mail from her mother every few years, but that is the extent of it.
  • edited December 2011
    I will have a lovely, sweet and very well balanced MIL, but not a FIL once FI's dad is deceased. On other hand, FI won't have MIL, FIL, SIL or BIL; my parents are deceased - but I am sure he would love them because they were the best parents in the world - and I am the only child. He will have two stepsons and I will have one stepdaughter.
  • edited December 2011
    Both of our parents are deceased.  The last remaining parent was my Mom, who died last May.  His Dad died in 2003.  My Dad and his Mom died long before we met.  I wish my Dad had met him, he would have liked DH so much (they share a lot of characteristics.)  I wish I had met his Mom, or his Dad before he was ill.  ~Donna
  • handfast4mehandfast4me member
    Seventh Anniversary 1000 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    I'm very fortunate, I have a MIL that is wonderful, and she thinks I'm just as special.  DH and I have actually discussed that if something happens between us, she'll keep me and get rid of him!  LOL. 

    However, on the flip side, FIL is not around.  He left his family for another woman, and then DH's brother completed suicide, he had the nerve to send my MIL a bill for cleaning out the apartment!!!!!   So, we have no contact with him although he did hire a PI to track us down, and has sent us cards on occasion and e-mails. 

    Both of my parents are deceased, so poor DH has no in-laws.  Everyone loved my folks, so that  is hard for me that he never met them. 
    image Don't mess with the old dogs; age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! BS and brilliance only come with age and experience.
  • edited December 2011
    My first MIL was and is still awsome, Im very fortunate that I am still in contact with them and on very good terms, as his whole family understand what I went through with him and have been there for me and our children whenever we needed. Also Ex-BIL and his partner are invited to my wedding to FI this summer as they have opened their hearts and home to FI and his kids....they are an awsome family to be in, even when you are no longer part of their family
    FMIL is great also, have had to express myself a bit more bluntly then I would have liked to as I was brought up with the respect your elders all my life, but she has seen how much I have done for FI and his girls(they have matured so much in the last 2 yrs...totally different people) and appreciates that.... so life is good.
    I just wish that FI could have met my parents(parents were both killed in accidents dad in '91 and mom in '05) they would have loved him as much as my 2 teens and I do....
  • debnchrisdebnchris member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I will not -- and I wish I did
    I knew her very well when FI & I were together in high school and loved her like she was my real mom. She was such a positive women and helped us both so much she would have been so happy to see us end up together.   
  • AbbeyS2011AbbeyS2011 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011

    The first time around, ExH's mother adored me - she called me "Angel" because she said I was so sweet.  She passed away years before xH and I married. 

    FH's mother decided when he was about 13 that she did not want to be a mother, so she walked out on her H and her 6 children.  He does not know to this day if she is alive or dead.

    My parents (Dad and StepMom) really like FH and he likes them alot too.  We will be staying with them when we fly home for a HM and family reunion in August.  Every time they call they talk to him as well as me and the kids. 

    FH's brothers and sister love me.  All of them at one time or another have said to him (about me) "Don't screw this up - you got a good lady here".  It is nice to have that seal of approval, and I love his family dearly. 

    Anniversary
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