Second Weddings

Bridal Shower or not


   My wedding is in 6 weeks. I know that this is my second wedding but it would still be nice to have a bridal shower with just a few friends. I don't want a big family one like the first time. I understand that the MOH or BM are not obligated to do anything and my mother is 90 yrs old. Is anyone else feeling the same way?

Re: Bridal Shower or not

  • I didn't have a shower for my first marriage and won't have one for this marriage either.  Nobody offered to host anything, so that's that.   I don't feel cheated.   Yeah, it would have been nice, but I honestly don't care.
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  • The only shower I had was an after work cocktail hour with my work colleagues.  It was very nice.  Had they not offered, I would have been fine without it.  I appreciated it, but didn't expect it.  I think that your feelings are what they are.   ~Donna

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_bridal-shower-or-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:9ca4ef9b-3541-4c1d-9b47-7cf07f1f28d0Post:3a893313-321f-48bb-a04b-cdcb80ac35b7">Re: Bridal Shower or not</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong><font color="#800080">I didn't have a shower for my first marriage and won't have one for this marriage either.</font></strong>  <u>Nobody offered to host anything</u>, so that's that.   I don't feel cheated.   Yeah, it would have been nice, but I honestly don't care.
    Posted by Avion22[/QUOTE]

    Ditto.  Are we living parallel lives, Avion?
  • I'm ashamed to admit that I felt kind of slighted about no one offering to host a shower for me when I got married the first time.  I'm starting completely over this time, so I do need a lot and if someone offers, then I'll accept.  If they don't, I hope to not feel bad again, but I probably will.  It's not about the presents, I just would like to get together and celebrate my wedding and be girly for an afternoon.  They could leave the presents out and just bring their good advice and recipes to be honest.
  • I didn't have one my first time and honestly did not think I wanted one this time. My mom and aunt decided (not offered - told me) to throw one for me and I'm really looking forward to it.

    Is there a way to maybe incorporate it into conversation with your MOH or BM without seeming like you're asking for one? Maybe they thought you didn't want one?

  •   My MOH's mother just had surgery yesterday for bladder cancer and I have one BM.  I'm having drinks with her tonight and see what she says. My FI and I don't need anything, but it's nice to celebrate with family.
  • My first wedding was over 20 years ago, so I think my family (especially my daughter) will want to throw me a shower. I have no problem with that!  I don't know about registering for gifts, however. I didn't the first time either. I prefer letting people get me what they want and can afford.

  •   My first wedding was 24 years ago. I'm almost 50 and view things differently at this point in my life.  I've had a great time planning my wedding and I'm not stressing over anything.  My mother remarried when she was 64 and we had a small personal shower for her. I even helped out with my sister's shower when she remarried. I know my friends are planning a girl's night out
  • I didn't have a shower or a bachlorette my first time around. 98% of my friends now are from my new (happier) life and so this is the first for them. My MOH (who absolutely ROCKS) gave me a Bridal Shower. Even though it was small it was great just to spend an afternoon being girly and talking wedding. We are have my bachlorette this weekend. I hope you get something to celebrate your new love and happiness too.
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  • My first wedding I had a bridal shower which was thrown by my sister, bridesmaids and mother. That was four years ago. Now that I am engaged again....I am certainly telling my sister (whos is moh again) to not have one thrown. I just do not think it is right to do that to my same friends again.

  •  My first shower was 24 years ago. Some are the same friends but most are new. What ever happens happens! I'm still marrying the man of my dreams.
  • I had a shower the first time. My Maid of Honor for my first marriage is my Matron of Honor for my second wedding. The Bridal Party is throwing us an adult cocktail party instead of a shower with the wedding party and our close friends.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image 152 Invited!
    image 104 Are ready to celebrate with us!
    image 44 Will be missing out!
    image 4 Are making us wait for the RSVP!

    RSVP Date - 6/15
  • I have been incredibly blessed. My family and friends threw me all the parties imaginable the first time, and they are doing so again this time.

    I love being able to get together and celebrate with my friends and family and I totally understand feeling disappointed if you miss out on this, but like pp said, you can still have the get-together, without the official shower/b-party, just go ahead and invite your loved ones to go out for some drinks, or to go do some pre-wedding pampering.

    YOU can invite the ladies in your life to go to a nail salon and do all your nails together a few days before the wedding!
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