Second Weddings

Anybody regretting NOT having a courthouse wedding?

We are getting married in 28 days. The wedding theme is just what I wanted, and everything seems to be going well. But as my second wedding, I am sort of regretting not just having a courthouse wedding. It's my fiance's first wedding but with all of the stress and planning he wishes we just had a courthouse wedding as well. But with 28 days and 50 of 150 guests coming to the wedding we dont have much of a choice but to go through with the regular wedding. Just curious is anyone else has the same feelings or if I am just stressed.
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Marrying the most amazing man I have ever known 12/18/2010. Can't wait to FINALLY be his wife!

Re: Anybody regretting NOT having a courthouse wedding?

  • edited December 2011
    Hmmmm.....   I think a few brides will take offense to your statement "just a courthouse wedding" as it seems to undermine that particular choice.  It also makes the assumption that its the easier choice, which IMO is not true.  Weddings, whether they are a first, second, or third can be stressful. 

    I would chalk up all of what you are feeling to prewedding stress.  We are getting married in 8 days and I am pretty much wigging out.  I've had four request of "can you squeeze in another chair?" and other assorted stresses of packing all our things for our "quasi" destination wedding.  Lately I've been thinking that the entire wedding was so unnecessary -- that all I really need is the love and support of my FI... However... what we really wanted was a party to celebrate our love, and to share this moment with the people who we care most about.  I hold on to this thought, and it gets me through. 


  • edited December 2011
    I guess the thought crossed my mind when I start to see the vendor deposits and other $$ going out of the accounts, but my gut says if I went all out the first time and that marriage  didn't work why should I cheat myself and my man (his second time around also) out of a wonderful party and beautiful memories this time?  I have no doubt this one is a keeper and we both deserve an event with the ones we love close by. 

    Only YOU know for sure if you're planning the sort of wedding you really want but if you're having serious doubts its not too late to call it off and do it the way you really want.
  • nmauser82nmauser82 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I can't speak for anyone else but I definitely know how you feel. Several times during this process (and the first time I planned a wedding also) I have wanted to call it quits and run to the courthouse, or a small island someplace just the two of us. The funny thing is that I loved helping my friends plan their weddings, I couldn't get enough of it. But when it comes to my own, I can't make decisions and that leads to stress and... ugh. I can't wait for the planning to be over and to be married.

    Don't worry, I'm sure that your wedding will be beautiful, and no matter how things turn out, the important thing is that are married to the man of your dreams. I know it's easier said than done, but try not to stress out. If there is anything that you can cut out of the planning that will make you life a little bit easier, then I suggest to do it. Just sit back and think about how wonderful you will feel once it's all over with lol.
  • edited December 2011
    I didn't mean to offend anyone. I actually wanted a courthouse wedding more than anything in the world. I feel like our love speaks for itself and doesn't need a big flashy fancy wedding. But I know he truly wanted a wedding so I decided to give it to him. I am probably just worried. Everything is done, and paid for so I am just having the jitters about how all of my ideas and planning are going to come together.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

    Marrying the most amazing man I have ever known 12/18/2010. Can't wait to FINALLY be his wife!
  • edited December 2011
    ...OMG!  I want a moose at my wedding!!!   Surprised  LOL

    Seriously - I really wanted a small, intimate wedding and would have been more than happy with a JOP.  Darling wanted to do this up huge as his first was a quickie courthouse affair.  (I had the big white dress affair last time)  The fact is that the type of wedding you have has nothing to do with the quality of your marriage. So just focus on the day after and you'll be good!

     I'm just happy to be marrying my darling and if having a big party makes him happy, so be it!  (But seriously, I'm really dying with the costs!!)
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  • edited December 2011
    I would just chalk it up to pre wedding stress. I had a few second thoughts about the big wedding starting a few months before hand but I don't regret having our beautiful wedding. I was married in the courthouse the first time around so I really wanted to have a wedding with guests and a reception.
    Just got my pro pics and they are gorgeous!
  • edited December 2011
    Well I guess everything happens for a reason. We just found out that the courts were wrong and they had done something wrong in the final processes of my divorce ( that has been going on for two years) . They waited two months to tell us they had made an error and now the certified copy will not be here in time for the wedding ( as it took them two months to notify us that they had made the error.) So in the end we are getting both weddings- the public wedding and the courthouse wedding too. I am pretty happy that we both get the weddings we wanted.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

    Marrying the most amazing man I have ever known 12/18/2010. Can't wait to FINALLY be his wife!
  • LizdcLizdc member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    We did a courthouse wedding for just us in dec. Was so great. Really the perfect day. But now we are planning a ceremony on a beach in fl for our families ( including my boy and his boy) and a few friends. It is my husband second wedding and my first ( never married my son's dad). I am marrying ( we married in dec legally) the man I was engaged too when I was young 18 years after we first got engaged. That is why we eloped since we have waited long enough to be married. The courthouse was a great day. All about us and I will always cherish it. I am also glad we are doing a ceremony on a beach ( lovers key state park in fl)
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