Second Weddings

bridal shower

I have a question....this is my 2nd wedding his 1st...what is the etiquette on a bridal shower? I have had a few ppl tell me no since its the 2nd wedding but then have had some says its ok bc its his 1st. HELP!!!

Re: bridal shower

  • edited December 2011
    I personally think you do what you want.  I did not have bridal shower the first time.  I broke the rule and told my Mom I really wanted one since I never had one.  Who knows what will happen though.

    I say if you want it, and feel comfortable with it, do it!
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  • melissamc2melissamc2 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    It's my third wedding.  Friends are throwing a shower for me and I plan to enjoy it completely.

    There is no reason to celebrate your new marriage any less simply because you've done it before.

    I hate the theory that it's 'wrong' or 'poor etiquette' to have a shower (or anything else) for a second (or more) wedding.  It's a new marriage - it deserves to be celebrated all the way. 

    Good luck and congratulations!
    10-10-10
  • KilleenBrideKilleenBride member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    Since I didn't have one for my first I am hopeing someone  will throw one for me for my 2nd

  • edited December 2011
    I am planning a bridal shower because i have way too many things and what i don't have, he has. But...my closer friends are planning a "Lingerie Shower"for me ;this is sort of a new tendency for the second, thirds and etc .weddings (particularly in Italy), and I loved because this is an area where we always need something new right?!!!
  • 2dBride2dBride member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    There are never any guarantees of a shower, whether for your first wedding or your tenth.  It is something that a friend may volunteer to have for you, not something you can ask to have.  However, if someone does volunteer, it's fine to say yes.
  • sunlover07sunlover07 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I had one for my first wedding. I think I am going to make it clear to both of our moms that I don't want another ......that is just what I am comfortable with. 
    with my second wedding I am breaking away from the typical traditional wedding plans....
    Do what you are comfortable with.....
  • edited December 2011
    I had a lingerie shower for my first. It was fun.  One of the games, which was optional was to bring a personal item in a bag without a name on it. We had to guess whos lingerie it was.  You wouldn't believe how much the older ladies got into this. My mom realized that she had some pretty kinky friends.
  • AdelphiTNAdelphiTN member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I think I should have a REVERSE shower. Congrats dear guest, you won this pan! and this chair! And FI's fugly ol' blanket!
  • edited December 2011
    I loved Adelphi TN idea...that's a great way of getting rid of old things that we have and replacing them with some news!!!
  • edited December 2011
    Honestly, I'd say NO. I'm widowed and am remarrying and have been very clear I do not feel a shower is appropriate. I've told my closest friends we should have a girls day of lunch and mani/pedi's instead.

    Etiquette-wise it's ok to wear what you want, and do what you want, but showers are really a no-no for second weddings, if you've already had one for your first.

     If you do have one, you should not expect anyone who gave you a gift for your first shower to do so again.
  • AbbeyS2011AbbeyS2011 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I would like to have a wedding shower for this one, as I did not for my first.  I know that it is up to my friends/BP to do that, but I am sincerely hoping they will.  I do not think it is poor etiquette to have a shower.  A wedding is a celebration of two people getting married - I like any excuse for a party!
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  • Sloane99Sloane99 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I didn't have one for this time around but that was mainly because we're having a destination wedding and only a small circle of ladies in my hometown are actually invited. We did have a nice dinner out though and I thought that was great.
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