Hello everyone! I hope this is the right place for this thread -- it's the best spot for it that I could figure out!
My husband and I are considering renewing our vows at either our five or ten year anniversary. We decided to elope, so none of our family or friends was at our original wedding. We had initially planned to the big ceremony thing later, but it got pushed to the side, as is so easy to happen.
Recently, we've been considering renewing our vows so that our family and friends can celebrate our love with us, but there are a few things I'm not sure about. My husband, who has never been married before, wants to essentially have a wedding with the exception of the wording of the vows. He wants me to wear a wedding dress, have attendants, etc. I'm not so sure this is appropriate, considering we will have been married at least five years when we do this. However, we've talked to a few of our friends, and so far they are all very enthusiastic about the idea of finally having a wedding for us. I seem to be the lone dissenter, and it's hard to tell my husband that he's never going to get to have a wedding (this is my second marriage, so I've already done it once). I do, however, love the idea of having a great party to celebrate our marriage.
So with all of that in mind, I have a few questions that I hope you don't mind answering. I'm not sure if this is relevant, but we would be inviting around 80 (100 tops) people.
- Is it okay to have a vow renewal at our five year anniversary, since we didn't have a wedding? My thoughts were that, if it's going to be like a wedding, it would be better to do it sooner rather than later.
- Is it okay to wear a wedding-style dress, but maybe in ivory? Another option I've considered is something along the lines of a bridesmaid dress, but in white or ivory. I'm pretty sure that even if I did go the wedding dress route, it would be something simple (not overly poofy, short train, etc).
- I've read that you shouldn't do the walk down the aisle thing. Then how does the logistics of it work? One idea I had considered was my husband and I walking down the aisle together.
- Is it appropriate to have any attendants? My husband wants to have groomsmen because he thinks his friends will be upset with him if they aren't included. Would one groomsmen and one bridesmaid be an acceptable compromise?
- Should I carry a bouquet? I understand you can decorate with flowers all you like, but I'm not sure about this point.
- What sort of cake should we have? Should it be a wedding cake, or just something that reflects the two of us? I've heard of people recreating their original wedding cakes, but since we didn't have one, that doesn't apply to us.
These are the main questions that have been bothering me, so I hope you all can give me some guidance. Thanks in advance!