Ideas on doing something special for our FI

Erin McCormack

Hi Ladies,

     Just wondering if anyone is doing anything special for their FI before the wedding?  Love to hear your ideas!

    

LesPaul

I planned the entire wedding. 

suzieharris

I'm paying for the wedding and honeymoon. 

Erin McCormack

I too am planning the wedding with a little input from my FI, but, I was just thinking that it might be nice to compile some photo's and put them into a slideshow.  I wouldn't have it at the reception and bore everyone, rather just a cronicle of our time together just for him (us) that we can continue to add to over the years. 

thealphabride

I asked the fiance the other night if we are getting each other wedding gifts.
His response: "You got me and I got you, what more could we want?"
I have been looking for a special card for him and found a beautiful one with very beautuful sentiments. I will give it to him the day of the wedding.
You ladies made me smile.... I also planned the wedding and am paying for most of it.

arv266

My FI is very into his geneology and I found a nice family tree from Michael's that I can personalize.  Oh... And of course planning our wedding!

Sue-n-Kevin

Arv266's response reminded me of something I've been working on this week.

You can get a free 14 day trial on ancestry.com (just make sure to cancel before the 14 days are up if you don't want to pay for anything). I found my paternal grandfather's family's listings on old immigration records coming to Montreal from Liverpool in 1906, from Montreal to the US in 1909, and the censues pages with their names on them in 1910, 1920, and 1930. It was a real eye opener and proved a lot of what we had surmised to be false.

I did this for Father's Day for my dad, but saved and emailed the documents to one of my cousins who is into this.

My ancestors were Polish, and the name was, seriously, spelled 4 different ways on all these documents. It takes a LONG time to find this stuff, but the more info you give them, the fewer options that are returned.

Before my free registration expires I want to do this for my paternal grandmother's family, and fiance as well.

I also had a membership on ellisisland.org years ago and found my grandmother coming over on a boat into Ellis Island with an uncle. It's really cool.

You can print them out and place in a nice old fashioned looking binder.

Marrin713

Just curious.......why are you ladies paying for the wedding?  I am paying the bulk of it because he is self-employed and the last few years have been pretty lean but wondering about the rest of you?

Confession:  I also feel like I talked him into it.

arv266

We're spliting the cost pretty much 50/50 - exceptions being my gown and his suit.  We never sat down and said, ok - you pay for this and I pay for that... it just happened this way.  I am super budget conscious - and he just wants what will be good, so we're a good mix.   We don't have an over the top proposal story -- we had been talking about it (and his feelings that he just didnt believe in marriage anymore, as he was married to his X for 20 years, and my feeling that a ceremony that marked two people commiting their lives to each other was an absolute must for me...) I have two children, and living with a man that I am not married to is just not the way that I want to raise my kids.  So, for a host of reasons on Valentine's Day we decided to get married and truly unite our families.  My kids are thrilled.  His kids are older and not as "YEAH" as my kids, but are ok with it.  Did I talk him into it?  No.  His bottom line is that this is what will make me happy, and he wants to do whatever it takes for my happiness. 

What makes you think you talked your FI into marriage?

Marrin713

He was happy with the status quo.  And then I had a horrible year betw menopause, dad suffering w/ cancer and ultimately dying, problems with my adult son...........believe me, it was just a terrible year.  So when I mentioned getting married for the umpteenth time while sobbing over something, he agreed.  So I feel a little like it was emotional blackmail.

Erin McCormack

We haven't really sat down and discussed who's paying for what.  I started to get the favors, save the dates etc. Then I put the deposit on the rings, he put the cruise and airfare on his credit card and has been paying on that and will have that paid off while I've been putting money down on the reception hall.  I'll pay for my dress, and he'll pay for his suit.  It's just how it's all worked out.  In the long run in a few months, it will all be our money anyway, so however it's paid for it's still coming from us, no outside source. 

Marrin, I wouldn't think of it as you talked him into it.  He wouldn't be marrying you if he didn't want to.  If anything this just shows that he is commited to you.  He loves you and wants to make things right for you.  That's love anyway you slice it.  Take a deep breathe and enjoy your plans.

Marrin713

Yes, Erin I know you're right (well, in my saner moments I know you're right).  Thank you.

thealphabride

Hey Marrin!!!
Your wedding should be coming up here in a few weeks?

I am paying the majority because I wanted the wedding and nice reception, also my man is a bit frugal and I didn't want to "cheap out" on our wedding so to perserve the decision making power, I said I'd pay. I had a lot of the money in savings already, and used my tax refuds and mileage reimbursment from my job.

My fiance realized how much I am paying when he saw the budger and offered to pay for half the catering/bar. He was always paying for the honeymoon, men's attire, rehersal dinner, the rings. I am paying for the rest.

The reason I wanted a wedding is because I got married in the courthouse first time around and I deserve to have a nice wedding with family and friends in attendance.

nmauser82

I too want to do something extra special for my FI. I'm not sure what yet but after reading the geneology posts above me, I remembered that he really wants a framed print out of both of our family crests. Every time we go to Disney he mentions it. So maybe I will do that.

pst726

I am having an ice sculpture made into a penguin for my FI and also my garter will have a penguin on it. He is obsessed with them and he will love it.

DeniseF7

Mine says do whatever I want. Once we're married the bills are his too. Don't forget that!