To ask or not to ask...

NBienvenu1

I already have 2 of my bridesmaids picked out and am on the fence about my third BM.  I was in both of my FHs sisters weddings, and I am afraid that if I ask one to be in mine, the other will be offended.   I'm much closer with sister 1 than I am with sister 2, and sister 1's husband is best friends with my FH (we set them up).  What is the etiquette on this? Do I have to ask both?

jagore08

This is tricky since they are going to be your family.  Have you talked to your FI about this?  Is there a reason why you wouldn't ask both to keep the peace?  

em01092

Are you worried about even sides? If your FI only has 3 GMs, it's ok if you have 4 BMs. No big deal. Lots of brides have uneven sides. 

I think I would ask both of them. Usually I'd say to only ask who you are closest to, but sometimes for the sake of peace within a family, it's just easier to ask both of them to avoid drama and hurt feelings. 

NBienvenu1

I'm not as close with the other sister, but I do think all of you have a great valid opinion--they're going to be my family... best not to upset anyone!    As for 3 vs 4 total, I was also thinking of asking another one of my girlfriends to be a BM so thats why I was thinking only one sister.  It wouldn't look weird with uneven numbers right?

Thanks ladies!!

jagore08

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_ask-not-ask?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:075648d0-4ac1-4498-9e5d-e35f86f3e13aPost:9f35b1d2-0859-414e-8522-71abc90c8024">Re: To ask or not to ask...</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm not as close with the other sister, but I do think all of you have a great valid opinion--they're going to be my family... best not to upset anyone!    As for 3 vs 4 total, I was also thinking of asking another one of my girlfriends to be a BM so thats why I was thinking only one sister.  <strong>It wouldn't look weird with uneven numbers right?</strong> Thanks ladies!! :)
Posted by NBienvenu1[/QUOTE]
No!  No one cares if you have one more person standing on your side than your FI does.  Pictures will still look great and in 15 years you'll be happy that you asked everyone you wanted instead of worrying about how many people each side will have.

OliveOilsMom

I have 5 BMs and my FI will have 3 GM, uneven sides are fine!  No one notices uneven sides!  Similar thing happened at my friend's wedding, except it was extra guys, so I was escorted by 2 men!