A little background - I am 33, FI is 39. We've been together for 6 years and my family loves FI to death. His family loves me just as much. We have a 2 y/o dd and I'm a SAHM. My family is VERY close. Fi's family isn't. Due to our inability to pay for a huge wedding in our HCOL area that my family expects us to have, we're doing a DW. (Neither of our families has offered to pay for part of the wedding.) FI and I are both painfully shy and the thought of being on display on our wedding day literally makes me ill. We'd prefer to not have any guests at our wedding. His family is fine with that. Mine initially tried to bribe/force me into having the wedding at home so everyone and their mother can attend. After 6 months of that, I blew up at them and told them we're NOT changing our minds and that's that. They didn't talk to me for a month. When they finally brought it up at a family function, they said "Do what you want" but their body language CLEARLY indicated that they didn't mean it.So do we do what we want, or will we hear about it for the rest of eternity? I'm confused and this whole situation is making what should be a happy time in my life the exact opposite. I just want to marry the man I love. It shouldn't be this difficult.