Help!! Mother in Law and wedding gown dilemma!!

lisa6853

My soon to be mother in law is continually asking me questions about the style, type, color,etc that I am looking for in a wedding dress. Both my fiance and I have explained to her multiple times that I do NOT want my fiance to know anything about my wedding dress but she still continues to ask me about it in front of him. As of now she knows nothing about my dress and she actually doesn't even know I found my dress because I am so scared she will accidently say something infront of my fiance. I really would have liked to have included her in the dress fittings, etc. but this is the one thing I really don't want my fiance to know anything about. I don't want to hurt her feelings or cause any drama. Any suggestions for what I should do? 

[Deleted User]

I agree with cfa.

Do you have a good relationship with her? My MIL went with me to purchase my dress and never slipped anything to my husband.

Just bean dip her, change the subject.

hlq2011

Ditto Cfas.  It sounds like you're doing all you can do.

gossipgirl1983

I'm so sorry to hear about this. My own FMIL likes to bug me about my wedding dress all the time, too, but I actually want my FI to see my gown (I'm not American, and it's not unusual in my country), and she is adamantly opposed to that! 

My solution for a FMIL that wants to be involved with the dress, although not conventional and maybe even a little annoying because it requires a lot of effort, is to take her gown shopping with you and to end the trip by trying to decide between two gowns (including the gown you chose). I'd use the gown shopping experience to try to bond with her and to try to tell her again that you really don't want your FI to know anything about your gown. My inkling is that she just wants to be involved and part of the reason why she keeps asking about it might be because she thinks you haven't purchased the dress yet. 

The more conventional, rational option: Tell her the truth, you bought the gown and you want it to be a surprise on your wedding day. 

If all else fails: Even if your FI finds out the kind of gown you'll be wearing, I guarantee there is no way he will picture the actual gown you chose. If my FI knew the difference between a sweetheart neckline and something like cap sleeves, I'd faint from shock! And unless you're choosing an unconventional color, the difference between white and ivory is not something that would be noticeable to a groom anyway. But each FI is different 

Best of luck! Either way, congrats on finding your dress!