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epwnba

fg

emilymae85

Hmmm... that sounds pretty tough.
If they had initial problems with your situation, you'd think would have said something previously.
There's something to be said for sticking it out to make everyone happy, but maybe you should have a sit-down talk with them. You're a grown up now, about to get married and you're right, times have changed! Maybe let them know it would nice to have their full love and support and let them know how greatful you are for them.

Perhaps they just do not want to see you go!

xoxob

I think that it's 21 days.

I understand why you want to be there to get settled, but even if you're living with your parents it doesn't mean you can't visit your new home, help prepare it, or even spend a night there.

I think that if you have stayed with your parents for this long, it's about more than their feelings and this is something that you (on some level) agree with.

You've waited this long, why not go the distance? I think it would make coming home from the honeymoon that much better. After all of that excitement you won't have to return to a mundane routine you're used to, you get to move into your home with your husband! That seems pretty special to me.

epwnba

Well I ended up changing things after having a chat with my sister. We will be moving in a week before wedding. Its not so much that my father is old school he is having a hard tiime coming to terms with my sister and I leaving the nest. It's becoming frustrating to us both though because it comes out in anger instead of just talking about things and getting over it (hence the silent treatment). I am all for talking about things, however they are the ones who brush me off as not wanting to discuss things each time I try. Ah well, I guess I will have to keep on trying.

xoxob

I think that's great that you guys talked it out and managed to compromise. You never know...after moving out, you may miss the crap out of them.

tommyandy

Trust me, the silent treatment is way better than the yelling treatment.  This way nobody says anything they will regret.

willowprincess

my fiance and i are doing something similiar. we get married may 28, but our move-in date for our new place is may 1. (we both have separate apartments now)
what we are doing is, he is moving into the new place, and i am taking teh whole month to move stuff in and get it settled. however, i will still sleep, shower, etc. at my current place unitl the wedding night. this way pretty much everything will be ready for us at the new place, but we can still maintain separate living spaces until the wedding. hope this helps.

beccababe

Your parents are only scared of losing you and to see you get married and leave.
they are scared of the fact your still growing and your getting old enough that they dont need to watch over you. So i would tell them that its all right and your always gonna be there for them in there hearts.

epwnba

Thanks for all the advice girls...I ended up sitting down with my dad and having a one on one with him. Turns out he is just overwhelmed by the whole thing and I think having the chat with him helped because my mom is no longer aggrivated. I think instead of him coming to me with his concerns of me leaving early he was nit picking and complaining to my mother about things, which was sending her over the edge. She did not want to tell me what he was saying because she "did not want to get in the middle and felt we should discuss things together." My parents are both younger and are very cool...I've always respected their rules and we hardly ever argue, which is why this was taking a toll on me. Happy Weddings to all of you!!!

Oh and P.S. im still "moving out" the weekend before the wedding, but will stay at my parents the night before - traditional !

Kniblet

Good for you for sitting down and talking it out.

I think what your dad is going through is what MOST parents go through.  My mom seems to be going through it as well... and I haven't actually lived with her in YEARS.