black BM dresses just to keep THEM happy?

karla&andre

Hi ladies,

Picking bridesmaids dresses has been giving me a headache ever since I started trying... at the beginning I was like "I want to keep my four girls happy, so I'm reday to compromise" but now two of four are being so damn difficult with the color...

I do understand that all four girls are so different, tall, short, blonde, red hair, black hair, tanned, very light skin... I've already told them I'm ok with finding one fabric and one color and the shape is up to them as long as it's either long or short for all of them. But even agreeing on one color is a pain! Of course I kind of want them four to "match" (We're having white, blush, pale pink and peach as our colors)

Now I'm considering picking black and adding waist bands in blush just to keep them happy but I am not really fond of that... any advice from your side?

Fancypantsamy

I think as long as you're keeping their budgets in mind, the color is your choice. Peach or beige should be neutral enough for everyone's hair and complexion. 

What if they all had the same shape dress, but could choose between the different colors in your scheme?

karla&andre

We couldn't agree on one shape in the first round, so I suggested "different shape-same color" instead of "same shape-different color" but they weren't too enthousiastic about that either. I want them to match though. I study art and design, so these points are important to me and they know that. 

I did talk about budget with them right away, individually; two kindly declined my offer to meet halfways and added they'd wear anyhing I want them to (every bride's dream - isn't it?). The other two girls did accept my offer (whicht I am perfectly fine with - otherwise I wouldn't have asked) but they are soooo picky at the same time.

I really chose my four bridesmaids with care, they're my besties and they are very important to me, but I'm kind of sad that they're making it so hard at the same time!

GoodLuckBear14

Honestly, at this point, I would pick out three colors and tell them to choose.  The color with the most votes wins (and with three there cannot be a tie).

artbyallie

Would you be okay with them wearing whatever shade of blush/peach works best on them? My bridesmaids wore different shades of blue and looked great.

MairePoppy

As long as you respect their budgets, you should get to choose the color scheme for your wedding. If you're not crazy about black dresses with sashes, then don't suggest it to your bms. You should narrow the color choices and then take a vote. The bms might feel better about the selections after they've tried on a few dresses, because pink, blush and peach are flattering to most skin tones.

Since your wedding isn't until next September, you could put off shopping for bm dresses until early spring - well past the holidays. There's no need to tie up their money, when they won't need those dresses for 9+months.

Simply Fated

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_black-bm-dresses-just-to-keep-them-happy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:3658beac-4d7d-464a-a9ca-5f930a1813c6Post:b522b581-984f-4ca6-9869-15a75c9026c5">Re: black BM dresses just to keep THEM happy?</a>:
[QUOTE]Honestly, at this point, I would pick out three colors and tell them to choose.  The color with the most votes wins (<strong>and with three there cannot be a tie</strong>).
Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]
Unless one color gets no votes.

But I do agree. Pick a couple of colors, 2 or 3. Hold a vote. Sometimes having too many options makes it overwhelming, so narrowing it wayyyy down is helpful.

mcda04

I agree with giving them the option of choosing different shades.

I used to stress so bad about dress color.

one of my BM's bought her dress the week before the wedding, i still wanted her in it so i ended up buying it online at JCP. the shade was a little off but it was fine since my daughter's God mother was in all the BP pictures and she was in a plum dress. She was in all my pictures because she was there for my getting ready's and since she was in a different color, my photographer assumed she was the MOH.

Peledreamsofrain

Honestly, I think the color is the one area you can just put your foot down.  They can pick the style, the fabric, etc, just do it in the color of your choice.  That's what my maids did, and they all were extremely grateful for the freedom, as well as the few guidelines that gave them direction (x length, x color).  They cared about making my wedding look good with their choices, and were very lost and nervous until I gave them the two guidelines.

I think you're giving them too much freedom, and it's causing confusion and dissent.  And I normally am the first person to pipe up and tell brides to chill out and let the party have more choice in their dresses, lol.

karla&andre

hello Ladies, 

thank you very much for your advice! to all of you! 

I think MairePoppy, you're right, it's too early to pin them down - I'll wait until late spring/early summer and come up with the length and 2-3 colors to chose from. I too think that style and fabric are enough freedom to chose! 

I guess by that time the new collections are out, too, maybe it's just the season that's making them prefer dark shades at the moment! I'm from Germany and last week we had our first snow ;-)

xoxo