Moms and Maids

Horrible MOB dress, how do I kill it?

My mom recently bought a dress to wear for our wedding in October, which is great, I was glad she found something... until I saw a picture of it.

It is a white taffeta long coat (which looks like a lab coat) and a long shift dress underneath. Completely plain, shiny, and looks cheap. It is awful and completely unflattering. I have tried reasoning with her, but nothing I say will do anything. She won't budge and I am at my wit's end. I also can't go shopping with her because I live and work about 2000 miles away. I have even considered the expense of flying to see her for a weekend just to try to get her to go shopping.

My fiancee's mother is the exact opposite, she has been amazing about what she is wearing and it looks great on her! I just want my mom to look as beautiful as she can, and this white thing is NOT doing anything.

Anyone have any suggestions on how I can change her mind, short of flying there?

Re: Horrible MOB dress, how do I kill it?

  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    It doesn't sound at all flattering but you are going to have to let this one go.  The sooner the better.  The important thing here is that SHE thinks she looks beautiful, not if you or anyone else does.

    This is not your call, she is an adult and not part of the bridal party.  Let this go and ditch the stressing over it.
  • jagore08jagore08 member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_horrible-mob-dress-kill?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:4121fa83-9d98-45cb-b121-498eb26f011dPost:90af02bb-9358-4380-a57d-85f41b7bcef6">Horrible MOB dress, how do I kill it?</a>:
    [QUOTE]My mom recently bought a dress to wear for our wedding in October, which is great, I was glad she found something... until I saw a picture of it. It is a white taffeta long coat (which looks like a lab coat) and a long shift dress underneath. Completely plain, shiny, and looks cheap. It is awful and completely unflattering. I have tried reasoning with her, but nothing I say will do anything. She won't budge and I am at my wit's end. I also can't go shopping with her because I live and work about 2000 miles away. I have even considered the expense of flying to see her for a weekend just to try to get her to go shopping. My fiancee's mother is the exact opposite, she has been amazing about what she is wearing and it looks great on her! I just want my mom to look as beautiful as she can, and this white thing is NOT doing anything. Anyone have any suggestions on how I can change her mind, short of flying there?
    Posted by breightling[/QUOTE]
    Your mom has, presumably, been dressing herself for years and she has every right to do so for your wedding.  If you have said something to her and she still wants to wear the dress she purchased then there's nothing more you should do.  My moms dress wasn't my favorite and I thought she could have gotten a better dress but that's what she chose and she's a grown adult and capable of making her own decisions.  
    Ignorance is a poor defense. Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • edited December 2011
    Your mom gets to make her own choice for wedding attire.  Just let it go.
  • edited December 2011
    I don't know when this idea started, that the moms have to get the bride's approval on their dresses. The bride only gets a say in what the wedding party is wearing. The moms get to wear whatever they like. Let it go.
                       
  • edited December 2011
    And unfortunately...not a darn thing you can do about it.  She's a grown woman and is allowed to wear whatever she chooses...no matter how hideous you think it is.
    My baby girl is a married woman...and now my baby girl HAS a baby girl. Time unfolds in such an amazing way. I've been blessed!
  • edited December 2011

    This just makes me sad for some reason.  What do you mean you tried to "reason" with her?  I'm assuming you mean telling her how awful she is going to look in the dress?  I can't imagine being that mean to my mom, if she thinks she looks beautiful that's all that matters, let her be excited about the outfit she chose. No one will even notice what she's wearing- they'll be looking at you and your FI. 

    p.s. I also really hope you didn't repeat the part to your mom about FMIL being amazing and looking great (unlike her).  That's just hurtful.

  • breightlingbreightling member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    No, when I say I tried to reason with her that means I said that something with more dazzle or "oomph" would really make her look great for this memorable and documented day. She has spent her whole life taking care of my siblings and I, OF COURSE, would never be as awful as it must have come off.

    She doesn't seem to be that excited about it either, (she isn't ever really excited about dressing up as it is) but it fits, and its fine for the occasion..her words, not mine.

    and I would have to be a soul-less bridezilla to tell her that the groom's mom will look better than her.

    Thanks for the advice everyone and I am trying to let it go.
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