Moms and Maids

Help me choose my MOH!

Hello,

I am having the hardest time trying to choose my MOH.  I have narrowed it down to two wonderful options and can't decide.  HELP! 

Background:
My mom is planning my bridal shower and I'm having a destination wedding, so my MOH might be pretty lucky as far as her role in the wedding- I'm not asking her for much.  Basically, I would like someone to go dress shopping with me, help me make the tough decisions, and to stand by as emotional support. 

Option 1: KG: While KG is my oldest and closest friend (most like a sister to me) she lives on the opposite side of the country.  She will most likely not be available for most of the pre-wedding events like dress shopping, etc, and definitely won't be available for those last-minute, fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants moments.  However, she seems to be the most natural choice.  She's been around the longest and I know I could trust her to be great the "Day Of," even if she'd be unavailable most of the time before the wedding.  

Option 2: AM: AM was one of my fiance's best friends through middle, high school, and college.  I met her in college shortly after I met my fiance.  She has been a great friend to both of us ever since. Also, she is my closest friend these days, especially considering she is local and my other close girl friends live so far away.  She has definitely been around the most for the wedding planning I have done so far, and has already sort of taken on the role of MOH when it comes to the emotional responsibilities; she's been there so far every step of the way.  I would love to have her as MOH, especially considering the close relationship she's had with my fiance all these years.  However, she has been known to be a bit of a flake in the past.  At random times in recent history she's been known to just take off on a moment's notice, not to be seen again for weeks.  I don't think she'd do this while I was planning my wedding, but then again, the notion that she could worries me enough to make me think twice about asking her.  She has never been the most responsible person in the world, but I'm 90% sure she would pull through considering this is a very important event and she knows that. 

So, my choice is difficult: Do I choose my oldest, closest girlfriend even though she would not be present except for the day of the wedding (and possibly a few days before) or do I choose my newer (yet still close) friend who might flake out of responsibilities here and there?  (Remember, I don't plan on making my MOH responsible for very much regardless.) 

What would you do??  Thanks for your help!!

Re: Help me choose my MOH!

  • sparent2010sparent2010 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Technically your MOH needs to be there the day of. There is no duties or responsibilities before the wedding she needs to do.

    That being said how many people are in your BP? You can either have no MOH or 2 MOH.
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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    edited December 2011
    Pick your bridal party according to who means the most to you and who you want standing up at the alter with you, not who will be available to go dress shopping or attend pre-wedding parties or help with any last minute issues. 

    That being said, if they both mean a lot to you then just have two MOHs.

  • KristenG2011KristenG2011 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    You know..I had this same problem. It is very difficult and can take its toll on you as to who to decide. My fiance and I thought it would be nice to each  just have one person stand up for us.

    I had a friend who I've known since we were in preschool.  We get together occassionally. Don't talk on the phone that often etc.  Then I have this other friend..who I've known for about 7 years....email each other every day....call eachother up spur of the moment when something happens and  she lives out of state.

    Everyone was telling me my logical choice was my friend from preschool.  But the more I thought of who I would want to stand up with me..who has been there for me NOW who I'm closest to  I decided on my friend who I have known the least amount of time and is out of state. Even though she is out of state...she is still sharing in the experience with me.  I email her pics and links to wedding favors..napkins..dresses everything.  It doesn't take away at all from the experience.

    Hopefully my story helps. :)
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