Moms and Maids

BM Gift/Hair & Make Up

I am having a small wedding party, 2 MOHs and 1 BM. I was going to pay for hair and make up as part of their gift. Now my BM told me she doesn't want to get up in time to get her hair/make up done. Our wedding is @ 2, and so we aren't starting to get ready until 10:30. Do I get her a bigger/different gift or just the same smaller one I give my MOHs?

Re: BM Gift/Hair & Make Up

  • SKPMSKPM member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer Name Dropper
    Hair and makeup for your wedding isn't a gift for anyone. If you require them to have these services done, you are required to pay. If you don't, then you don't have to pay. You still can, but it shouldn't be their gift. Shop for them individually, for things they can enjoy after your wedding is over.

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  • jagore08jagore08 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Anniversary First Comment
    edited May 2012
    Even if you're paying for their hair and makeup (which really isn't a gift) you should purchase them a little something else that suits their personalities.  It doesn't have to be expensive but just something to say thank you for standing up for me. 
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  • Hair and makeup should not be considered part of their gift.  A BM gift should be something that reflects their personality and has nothing to do with your wedding or any wedding for that matter.

    As for your one BM, it is fine if she doesn't want to get her hair and make-up done, but getting up by 10:30am is really that difficult for her?  Cray-cray.

  • I was going to get them each something small in addition (I think I put that). I've had one decent BM gift, the rest of the time it is something for that day that I've never used again.  Everytime I've thought "I don't want this bracelet/earrings/whatever."
    I am also not requiring them to have it, just thought it would be nice to pay.
  • If you are getting them all something different anyways, and she is choosing not to have her hair & make-up done, then I don't think you need to get her an additional gift. 
    Anniversary
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_bm-gifthair-make-up?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:43bf697e-7c23-4fea-9fb8-a5ac9cd25f7ePost:1337c6c3-5888-4f72-b397-a8fe8664d4d8">Re: BM Gift/Hair & Make Up</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you are getting them all something different anyways, and she is choosing not to have her hair & make-up done, then I don't think you need to get her an additional gift. 
    Posted by jemmini6[/QUOTE]

    this.  If you stop thinking about the hair/make-up as a gift it becomes really straight forward.  Then they're all getting relatively equal gifts and on a completely separate note two of them took you up on your offer for getting their hair done.  see what I mean?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_bm-gifthair-make-up?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:43bf697e-7c23-4fea-9fb8-a5ac9cd25f7ePost:8db81184-f037-41e1-8b98-09f37cab3668">Re: BM Gift/Hair & Make Up</a>:
    [QUOTE]I was going to get them each something small in addition (I think I put that). I've had one decent BM gift,<strong> the rest of the time it is something for that day that I've never used again</strong>.  Everytime I've thought "I don't want this bracelet/earrings/whatever." I am also not requiring them to have it, just thought it would be nice to pay.
    Posted by lmcoll86[/QUOTE]

    Do you see why that's not a good gift?  Did you ever like getting something that you would never use again?  No.  The BM gift is an opportunity to say 'Thank you for being in our wedding, for spending time and money to make our day special."  Think of it that way.
  • Wow. She can't get up in time to get her hair done? Is she able to do her own hair and makeup so she looks decent? Gheez Louise, what a piss poor excuse when you have asked her to be in your wedding and are paying for the services to be done. It's not like you are asking her to get up at the crack of dawn. I shope she's able to get herself  out of bed and looking presentable in time for pictures. Yegads. 
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