My mother is inviting people and blasting the plans on FB!!!!

LindsayLove14

I love my mom to death, and I am super happy that she is excited about the wedding, especially since she wasn't very excited until we set a date. Now she is posting on FB the day and place and right away, people are asking if they are invited. She has told all of them that they are, even if I told her I wasn't inviting them or didn't like them. It's supposed to be a somewhat small wedding with 60 or so guests. We can't afford to invite more and while she is helping with the wedding payments, when does it hit a point that I have to tell her to stop? Freaking out a little here....

AddieCake

When does it hit that point?   It already has. It has also hit the point that you need to stop sharing your wedding plans with her if she can't manage to be so inappropriate. How much is she contributing?  Let her have and be a part of the information for those elements only. 

MairePoppy

Ditto Liatris - don't let your mother's open invitation to her friends go without a comment from you.

Putting details about your wedding plans on facebook is a very, very bad idea for so many reasons. Every single day,  there are posts on The Knot from brides about facebook misunderstandings. Don't use facebook to communicate with your wedding party, guests or acquaintances.

It's nice that your mother is excited about the wedding. Since she is contributing to your budget, it's important to keep her in the loop. It's time for you to go over the guest list and the budget with her. You should be able to figure out the number of guests that you and fi, your side and his side will be able to invite.

Congratulations on your engagement.

EK2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_my-mother-is-inviting-people-and-blasting-the-plans-on-fb?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:47707ce8-60cb-42e2-aef9-6f9cefe8af3dPost:c207eb56-d6b8-4ecd-aed6-fb74b72e5c18">My mother is inviting people and blasting the plans on FB!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]I love my mom to death, and I am super happy that she is excited about the wedding, especially since she wasn't very excited until we set a date. Now she is posting on FB the day and place and right away, people are asking if they are invited. She has told all of them that they are, even if I told her I wasn't inviting them or didn't like them. It's supposed to be a somewhat small wedding with 60 or so guests. We can't afford to invite more and while she is helping with the wedding payments, when does it hit a point that I have to tell her to stop? Freaking out a little here....
Posted by LindsayLove14[/QUOTE]

<div>It might be worth mentioning to your mother that one of the reasons she shouldn't post your wedding plans on Facebook is that it's not unheard of for robbers to strike when they know the whole family will be gone.</div><div>
</div><div>This was a big reason why I didn't end up posting a wedding announcement in the local paper.</div>

mdupon70997

I don't know about you, but I'm the kind of bride who wants a ton of things for our wedding to be a surprise to our guests or I want to be the one tell people things. So when FI and I got engaged (my mom and his parents were there) my mom immediately called all of our family members and told them. It made me really mad because I wanted to be the one to tell people (plus she's a huge drama queen, so I knew it would be more exciting & believable coming from me.) Maybe you should just tell her the way you feel, and then tell her that if she can't stop spreading the news to everyone you won't share any more of your plans with her.

NeedWeddingFavors

One thing to consider, did your Mom knowingly post details to "everyone" or did she try to message someone privately but inadvertently post the message publically. I see this all the time, so her excitement might gotten the best of her. I'd explain it and forgive, you need Mom for all the wedding planning and the wedding. :-) 

Also, anyone who makes plans to attend a wedding without getting a formal invitation is not being smart. One of my co-worker said to me, "You should come to my wedding." but I don't really know his wife and never got an invite, and wasn't dishearterned because I know that when all the details are worked out things change.