Moms and Maids

MOG will NOT wear corsage..!!!

My FMIL said she "doesn't wear corsages or wristlets. I just don't do those." Just what I wanted to hear. She wants to carry a bouquet instead, like she did at her OTHER son's wedding. I personally don't want the mother's to carry a bouquet.  A few stems fine, but not a bouquet. Any ideas? Thanks!

Re: MOG will NOT wear corsage..!!!

  • edited December 2011
    I suggest you choose your battles.  Is it really that big of a deal?  I would compromise with her and pick a small arrangement of flowers for her to carry.  It can be a smaller version of the BMs bouquets. 

    Is this really something you need to fight about?  Let her win.  She's going to be your family....which, might I add, is way longer than those flowers are going to be alive. 
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  • Magdeline687Magdeline687 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mog-will-not-wear-corsage?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:5ef5a55c-693b-476b-909c-84419a715744Post:d8bea283-3bc9-4f95-a6f6-19082e690428">Re: MOG will NOT wear corsage..!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I suggest you choose your battles. 
    Posted by crystal8503[/QUOTE]

    My thoughts exactly. It is annoying that she is being a little diva-ish, but this is really not that big of a deal in the scheme of things. I would look to see what alternate flowers your florist offers. Maybe a mini-bouquet?
  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Well, I'll start by saying I carried a very small nosegay at last DD's wedding - I did not want a stupid corsage!  I would have also been just fine with NO flowers, but they are for old ladies and proms.  I had a corsage at DD #1's wedding and it was DOA after the receiving line.

    Her biomom wore a corsage, her MIL was given flowers for her hair because she also hated corsages, and I had a nosegay.

    Can I ask why this is such a big deal? There is a world of difference between a tiny nosegay and a full on bouquet.  I didn't want anyone thinking that was what I was after - that sucker was very small and we were all happy.
  • asummerlyasummerly member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    My mother and the MOG are going to have what are florist called "clutch bouquets" of calla lillies.  They're very small bouquets, and you might want to consider something like that.  These will be all white, which is a big contrast to my bouquet and my BM bouquets, which are mostly fushia and lavendar blooms.
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  • kemmy613kemmy613 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I don't think the flowers are really what is bugging me....I think her demands have have started to add up. I am an easy-going bride and you are right, flowers are not worth fighting over. As my 1st grade teacher said, "You get what you get and you don't pitch a fit!"


    Thanks!

  • eviltwin13eviltwin13 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    When my parents met my FI's parents for the first time, his mom brought a corsage for me to wear. I thought it was the sweetest thing and wore it the whole night, then dried it so that I could display it on my shelf. I disagree that corsages are just for old ladies and proms. I was very touched by the gesture.
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mog-will-not-wear-corsage?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:5ef5a55c-693b-476b-909c-84419a715744Post:40bc8e36-ab39-4698-9bd2-3aa29c6a9f2d">Re: MOG will NOT wear corsage..!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]When my parents met my FI's parents for the first time, his mom brought a corsage for me to wear. I thought it was the sweetest thing and wore it the whole night, then dried it so that I could display it on my shelf. I disagree that corsages are just for old ladies and proms. I was very touched by the gesture.
    Posted by eviltwin13[/QUOTE]

    If you were touched by it and you like them, then they are great for you!  It's like beauty being in they eye of the beholder.  If DD had thrown the big one about her MIL and I not wearing corsages I would have sucked it up through the ceremony but that baby would have been gone as soon as the reception started because they just aren't me.  If it is something that touches you and works for you that's awesome.
  • ootmother2ootmother2 member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    I didin't wear a corsage nor did the MOG.  As retread said, they're for old lades.

    we both carries small nosegays

    chill, you'll go crazy if the small stuff gets to you
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    edited December 2011
    Um I doubt she means she wants to carry a huge bouquet.  She probably just wants to carry a small nosegay, which is basically just a few stems tied together.  This is what my MOB and MOG are carrying because I just prefer them.  Also corsages are not just for old ladies.  Corsages can be very beautiful but some people don't like pinning them to their clothes or they find that they get in the way if they are going to be hugging a lot of people.  Another option would be to have the mothers wear a wrist corsage which are also nice or have the corsage pinned to a clutch. 

  • 8daysaweek8daysaweek member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    MIL and my mother both had small bouquets of pink hydrangeas for the wedding. They were really pretty. My bouquet was pink roses (bright and light pink) and pink hydrangea; the bridesmaids had the roses only and the moms had the hydrangea. It all looked really great.
    Personally I would rather they have something they like and not waste money on something they wouldn't want.
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  • edited December 2011
    I agree with other posters.  This is not the hill you want to die on.
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mog-will-not-wear-corsage?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:5ef5a55c-693b-476b-909c-84419a715744Post:3258e96b-63b5-4a45-af58-cf41e485b732">Re: MOG will NOT wear corsage..!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I agree with other posters.  This is not the hill you want to die on.
    Posted by covejack[/QUOTE]

    This.  I was a nosegay mom too.  I carried it through the ceremony and the photos, then set it on the table and there it stayed for the evening.  Let it go.
    My baby girl is a married woman...and now my baby girl HAS a baby girl. Time unfolds in such an amazing way. I've been blessed!
  • edited December 2011
    Totally not worth the fight.  I wanted both mothers to wear corsages, but when we were meeting with the florist my mom insisted on a magnet corsage thing for her purse.  Honestly, I hate the idea and think it will look tacky.  However, she's my mom and she is the one wearing the flowers so I chose this battle was not worth it.  I did make sure that was what she really wanted and then smiled and said okay. 
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  • tesskerrtesskerr member
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    I wouldn't want to pin anything to my outfit, especially if it was silk or similar.
    I hear you on "It's not really about the flowers, it's everything she does" or however you worded it. You probably think if you let her win this, she will want to win everythnig, Well just let her win everything, and she will either stop bothering if she does it to wind you up, or come to love you so so much because you are the sweetest, kindest DIL, and stop bothering aswell.

    Goodluck!
  • discordiasadiscordiasa member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Is she paying for anything in the wedding? If so, she has a say. If your family (or you and your fiance) is paying for the wedding, go with what is in your budget and just explain that to her. If a small bouquet is the same price as acorsage, let her carry a small bouquet. If its resonable for the budget, I dont see a problem.

    However, I do see your frustration about her demads for your wedding, and how she compared it to her other sons wedding. Not every wedding is the same. Everyone has a different idea of how they want their day. 

    But in my opinion, its not that big of a deal. Dont start a war over flowers... 
    "Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies." ~ Aristotle
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