Step Mother Etiquette

ProudIrishGirl88

What do I do with my step mother in my wedding? Do I treat her like another mother? Is she just another guest? We were never close. In fact, I can't stand her. I'm making my programs right now. Do I include her?

ootmother2

Yes, include her. 

She sits in the second row with your father (her husband) and they are seated togeher and photographed together.

If you'e doing flowers, she gets them as well.

MairePoppy

In your situation, it's fine to treat your SM as a guest. Make sure you seat her with your father and treat her politely. It would be nice to include her in a photo or two. A picture of your Dad and his wife with you and your new husband will make a nice gift for the two of them. If your stepmother helped raise you or she and your dad are contributing to your wedding budget, then you should honor her with a corsage. If there are other stepparents being listed in your program, then include all of them.

JaxInBlue

Treat your stepmom in a way that is respectful to both to her and to your dad.  If you don't have a close relationship, I can see skipping her participation in the processional.  I would probably still get her a corsage and I would definitely make sure she sits next to your dad in the first row (possibly the second if your parents don't get along).  Include her in some pictures and in any thank you gifts if she and your dad contributed to your wedding.

Ditto Maire about treating all stepparents the same way.  My mom's H, my stepdad, helped raise me but my dad's husband didn't first come into the picture until I was 21 but because I was including my stepdad and dad's husband would have been the only parent omitted from things, we treated him equally.  Yes it felt a little weird at first but it wound up making everyone feel included and appreciated.

You can always list them in the program as Mr. and Mrs. DadFirst DadLast.

ETA: grammar

mcskatcat

I would just have her escorted in and give her a corsage.  In my book, unless someone is contributing financially you're never completely required to involve them in the wedding preparation.  If she asks to be involved, I don't think it would hurt to include her, though.