Moms and Maids

UPDATED...warning...may sound kind of selfish

Update:  I did talk to son and FDIL last night and they are 100% fine with it!  As they both stated, they know that we do this every year and apreciated the fact that we aren't having a fit about it and they already feel they come first (which they do!) and thanked me for everything we have already done! 

So my son and FDIL set a date.  It's Aug 2nd next year.  Up in this area it's an insanely busy weekend, but it's a date that means something to them, so I totally get it!  :)  BUt, here's my problem.  That is the weekend (first weekend in August every year) that my husband, I and a group of about 20 others go on a camping trip. We have done this for the last 10 years.  I'm from ND but it's with people from Minneapolis, South Dakota and Canada.  Now of course we still want to go and see everyone.  So here is my thinking.  I'm putting this here before I even talk to them about it, but I think it's reasonable, but like I said in the title, it may be selfish and I don't realize it. 

Since the wedding is Friday night, DH and I would like to go set up the camper at the site on Wednesday night after work, stay, relax, have a few beers and just chill before the next two days.  We bring a LOT of thigs that others use also, including the grill and games so we want all that available to them still.  (we are the closest to the campsite at 45 minutes away)

Thursday morning we come back into town, and it's ALL wedding, all day. Get reception site set up, decorate church (luckily in smaller areas like this we can do it the day before!) rehersal, grooms supper, check into hotel and all that jazz. 

Friday of course is the wedding so everything that goes along with that.  wedding at 7 pm, dance and reception after that.  Stay at the hotel that night, grandson will be sleeping in our room and we have a friend of my daughter's babysitting in our room after his bedtime. 

Saturday morning.  Checkout is at 11 am.  So will have all gifts packed up, reception torn down (they do most of it, but we of course have to get our centerpieces, guestbook, etc...) and have that all packed up and home. 

So here is my you think it's unreasonable of us to take off Saturday around noon-ish to join the camping group?  Wedding is done, clean up is done, they aren't honeymooning right away, so not worried about taking my grandson and gift opening is right away in the morning with coffe, juice, rolls and fruit. DH adn I are both very hard workers and would make SURE everything is done before we left. Her family will help also I'm sure.

We usually stay until Tuesday morning camping.  Is this reasonable or not? 

Re: UPDATED...warning...may sound kind of selfish

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    IMO I do not think that is unreasonable. If they know you do that every year they shouldn't have an issue with it.


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    It doesn't sound selfish at all, since you are making every effort to not have the camping take your presence away from the wedding. And you are even helping with set up and cleaning, ehich is really really appreciated by the couple.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten



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    I think what you have proposed sounds fine.  One thing you may not have considered, since it's so far away at this point.  Could you email your group and ask to change it to the week after for just this coming year?  If everyone agrees, I'm sure your campground would have no problem moving your dates to the following weekend. 

    I am surprised your S and FDIL set a date during your annual vacation.  We always tell brides to check with their VIPs before setting a date!
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    nah, we'll leave it the same weekend.  Why make that many other people change plans because of 1 couple.
    They chose that date because it has meaning to them and I understand that so it's fine.  As long as it doesn't seem like I'm being selfish and forgetting baout something, I'm fine with it.  I will talk to them tonight and see what they say. 

    Thanks for the input ladies! 
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    I think it sounds just fine.  I can not find any reason the times you have stated would be a problem at all. 

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    I think that sounds fine. I would ask your son and his fiance instead of tell them, though. But just basically tell them exactly what you just told us.
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    Sounds very reasonable.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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    Not selfish at all, and you're a GREAT mom and MIL for thinking of them while also taking a trip that is so special to you. Go for it.
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    Great to hear!
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