FMIL Attire - Need ur Suggestions!

SMessina82

Ok, so this is a pseudo rant, but more importantly, I need help in figuring out HOW to address my FMIL's "attire" for my wedding!

First a little backround on my wedding -- it's an afternoon full mass at a Church and a formal evening reception.

My FMIL has purchased the following for the Wedding - a floral knee length skirt (with a sequin trim) with a plain  WHITE cotton blouse. She also bought sequin ballet flats. (I am not concerned with the shoes, she has medical issues that prevents her from wearing heels).

My Mom and family are looking at formal dresses. Money is not the concern, my FMIL  probably spent more $ on the outfit I described than my BM dresses, Mother's Dress and Grandmother's dress combined....

So here are my questions- 1. Is this innappropriate? 2. Am I being overdramatic? and 3. If you think its inappropriate... How can I address it with her?

Thanks so much!!!

graysquirrel

While the sequined skirt doesn't sound the most fashionable (especially for an older lady), there isn't much that you can say or do that can end well regarding telling her that you don't like the outfit. A grown woman should be able to select her own clothes. If she feels comfortable in it, I'd let it go. If she looks silly, then she will be the one looking silly, not you.

As for the white, it is just a blouse. My aunt who was a reader wore a white dress to my wedding and nobody said anything. I was upset at first when my mom told me about the white dress, but on my wedding day I didn't even care. There are so many other things to be thinking about that people's clothes don't even register.

The only concern I'd have would be the appropriateness of her outfit at mass. Many catholic churches have restrictions about the amount of skin showing. I'd find out if your church has any stipulations on this. If they do not allow short skirts or arms showing, you might have an out.

covejack

It's fine, and anyway you shouldn't be telling your FMIL what to wear.  You'll sound like a brat.

redheadtmk

My only concern is with the full catholic mass....make the sure the church does not require full length skirts.

MairePoppy

Your FMIL is dressing properly for the afternoon Mass. An evening gown would be out of place for that time of day.

[Deleted User]

Let her decide what she feels comfortable in. If you're worried about the white blouse, it isn't that big of a deal. No one will remember what she wears and people usually remember what the bride wears more than anything.

SMessina82

I am really not trying to sound like a brat, that is not at all my intention. I figured I would get everyone's opinions on the matter.  (Better to sound like a brat on here, than in person!)

She would without a doubt be dressed appropriately for the Mass. My bigger concern is for the reception, which is a formal evening event and the fact that I've always been told "never wear white to a wedding."
I am definitely not trying to tell a grown woman what to wear, rather, the appropriateness of certain outfits. Would you feel comfortable with someone showing up in sweatpants to your formal wedding, or would you suggest otherwise?
I guess, is it REALLY that deep to bring it up to her?
A suggestion a friend gave me was to email her pictures of dresses other women in my family (mother, aunts, grandmother) are wearing just as a "FYI, here's the dress so and so is wearing" (like a hint)

I'm babbling at this point.... I'm sorry!

MairePoppy

You should give your fmil as much information as she needs to determine the formality of your wedding. Is she is not familiar with the venue, email her a link.

I would not care if anyone showed up in sweats for my event (actually, it will be my daughter's wedding), because that would be a reflection on their judgement, not mine. But to be honest, I would feel embarrassed if I showed up dressed inappropriately, myself, so I would probably appreciate a heads up on what the other mom will be wearing. If you are concerned that your FMIL might be embarrassed, email her the picture of your mom's dress. And then, let it be.

Don't worry about the white blouse. I wouldn't wear a white dress to a wedding. But that is not the same as a white blouse and colored skirt.

SMessina82

Thanks everyone!!!