MAJOR MATRON/MAID ISSUE AT CEREMONY

agall1006

My sister is my Matron of Honor, my best friend is my Maid of Honor. In my sister's wedding, I was the MAID of honor and stood next to her while the Matron stood next to me - I was going to do the same thing and have my best friend/Maid of Honor stand next to me. This upset my sister behind belief even though I explained it to her and rather than her talk to me she involved my mother who made me feel like a piece of crap  - she basically made it sound like it was a competition to be in my wedding party and whoever did the most, she says my sister has, should stand next to me. MIND YOU, I have a younger sister, that is a BM that she has completely ignored throughout this entire argument. Help me out here! Opinions ? So frustrated, I'm contemplating not having anyone stand next to me and have them all sit in the front row so no one's feelings are hurt.

Viczaesar

If it means so much to her, why not have your sister stand closest to you?  If your friend won't freak out about it as well, that is.  Honestly, this would not be a hill to die on for me.  The order that they stand in doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things.

CassieeK

I think your sister needs to grow up.  Honestly, I cannot imaging spending one minute caring about this!  I would be tempted to put your Maid of Honor, your Bridesmaid, and your Matron of Honor LAST.  Sorry....I'm no help, just annoyed for you!

Stayc516

I was in the same situation when my sister got married. She wanted her best friend to be "co-maid of honor" and that really pissed me off and hurt my feelings.My sister ended up just making me MOH but still. She is your sister. Friends will come and go, but family is forever. Choose your sister over your best friend.

MairePoppy

Maid of honor and matron of honor are equal titles. Why are your mom and sister making a big deal out of this? It's probably not worth arguing about, but I don't like being bullied, so I wouldn't give in.

jemmini6

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_major-matronmaid-issue-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:afecd264-6f2c-487f-bfd7-a6793c4557e0Post:fd07c8f9-10ef-4da0-ad40-c60057ea0246">Re: MAJOR MATRON/MAID ISSUE AT CEREMONY</a>:
[QUOTE]I was in the same situation when my sister got married. <strong>She wanted her best friend to be "co-maid of honor" and that really pissed me off and hurt my feelings</strong>.My sister ended up just making me MOH but still. She is your sister. Friends will come and go, but family is forever. Choose your sister over your best friend.
Posted by Stayc516[/QUOTE]


Why?  God forbid your sister have someone equally important to her that she wanted to equally honor.  That seems like a really childish thing to get upset about and you were wrong to have your sister choose.

OP- your sister is also being childish.  "Maid" and "Matron" of honor are essentially the exact same thing, so it shouldn't matter if you want the 'maid' to stand next to you just because that's what happened at your sisters' wedding.  Choose who you want to stand next to you, not that it really matters in the long run.

Are you having a head table at your reception?  Perhaps you could have your sister choose, would she like to stand next to you at the ceremony, or sit next to you at the reception?  That way they both get to have the 'first rank' or whatever and she can't get mad if she's the one that chooses.  Hopefully your maid of honor is being more mature about this though....

Maggie0829

I never understand why people get so upset as to where they stand for someone's ceremony!  Just let her stand next to you if it means so much to her.  It doesn't really make a difference either way and this way the drama will be squashed. 

Also, who cares if she had co-MOHs...a lot of people have more than one MOHs now a days...it doesn't mean that she cares any less about you it just means that she has two people that she is equally close to.  (I know that this wedding has already passed I just felt a need to comment on it)

Oh, and just because one person does the most for you in regards to wedding plannign does not make them the better person.  Geesh!  This is why I had 1 BM and 1 MOH...I could have asked a lot more but I just didn't want the drama.