Who to choose?

grinttook

I don't really have alot of close girlfriends, but I do hang out with a group of them on Fridays. The girl that I would normally think I would pick for my maid of honor has begun to frequently tell me that she is obviously going to be my maid of honor because I have noone else, then goes on to tell me that she is picking her sister to be here maid of honor. I know that family comes first, but I'm a little irritated that she already has herslef pegged in as my MOH before I even decided on a date. I feel like if I pick someone else she will be upset/mad, but it makes me mad that she already has my wedding lineup all planned out for me. What should I do?

artbyallie

Yeah, it's a little irritating that she's assuming (and doing so out loud to you) but you were planning to pick her as MOH anyway, so what's the big deal?

Summer2011Bride

I would tell her the next time she brings up being MOH that you haven't really thought about your WP yet. Ignore her assumptions and choose based on who you WANT to be in your WP. When that decision is made, if she's in it, tell her. If not, ask the people you want to be in your WP and don't tell her she didn't make it. If she brings it up, tell her you are excited to have her as a guest.

karulyne

You should choose someone that is near and dear to you and that you think you will have a lasting relationship with (at least this is my opinion! I wouldn't want to see anybody in my wedding photos that I ended up having a falling out with). Whether that is her or someone else for you, your call, it shouldn't be up to her to call dibs! I wouldn't be offended that she's not picking you for her wedding, its a personal choice. She may feel her sister is the most important in her life or that she'll be really good at taking on the extra responsibilites, not meant to be detrimental to you...or conversely she may be the type that likes to stir things up and she's telling you all this to get under your skin...you'd know her better than me obviously! I would think if you get the sense she's trying to mess with you with these comments that might be a good red flag to heed and skip her for your MOH, far less drama for you than having to deal with that all the way up to the wedding! But, she may just not realize how her comments are coming off, and if you were already considering her and think that might be the case you may just want to let bygones be bygones. For what its worth I'm skipping having a MOH, mostly because the girls I asked to be in my wedding party are all close to me and I'd rather not try to pick one.

daganielle

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_who-to-choose?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:b69add92-e1f6-443f-88eb-398f116a42fcPost:43bff64a-6889-4d5e-b5b3-928e131df25e">Re: Who to choose?</a>:
[QUOTE]Yeah, it's a little irritating that she's assuming (and doing so out loud to you) but you were planning to pick her as MOH anyway, so what's the big deal?
Posted by artbyallie[/QUOTE]
Agreed!