Wrote about a month ago, about issues I was having with my sister who is the MOH at my upcoming wedding. Recap: I had made plans with my other bridesmaids to go dress shopping 3 weeks ago, along with going to a bridal show, not expecting my sister to come. (she lives out of state) well she decided to come home and bring her new bf (James). After the weekend was over she call and said that I was rude to her during the dress shopping and that my and my FH (Brian) were rude to her new bf.
Since then she texted me and said that we needed to talk about the phone call, I decided that sending an email was better, that way nobody yelled or hung up, etc.
So I emailed her and said that is my point of view of the situation, and hopefully this allows you to resolve this issue. Your call Monday night was rude and uncalled for. Basiclly said that we rearranged a lot of our weekend to try and see her and bf as much as possible. Had other plans that we cancled and moved.
I have been trying to get this dress fitting done for a month and a half, and have had issues with some of the bridesmaids constantly cancelling. The night before this I get a call that one of my other BM and her daughter had a big fight, so I’m thinking I'm going to have to reschedule yet again. Told her that I didn't think I ignored her but at the same time I thought my sister had it together, knew what she wanted and was mature enough to support me. Not cry that she didn’t get enough attention when I was just trying to FINALLY get this dress fitting done.
Then talked about her new bf. Said that he seems like a nice guy and that I came before the dress fitting to meet him. Didn't have too, could have just met him later, but wanted to meet the guy that she had raved about for 25 minutes.
Mentioned that I was involved with the conversations Brian was trying to start at lunch, but it felt like a question and answer session because James was kind of quiet and not really asking any questions back to continue a conversation. Said As far as before dinner goes, I didn’t mean anything by not talking much, but by that time I was getting tired after being up since 3 am, and it was a little hot and crowded. At dinner I was on the completely opposite corner of the table so it was very difficult to hear any of the conversation on that end. Not only that, but before you even got home there was talk about you trying to balance your weekend to see the family and have some personal time with James. So Brian and I never pushed. I was actually excited to show you our apartment but Brian thought you’d rather have your time with James. Since, in his words, you haven’t even really had a week of face time with the guy.
Now on to Brian, of course he was angry when you called.
Brian says, “I can’t believe how self-centered your sister is. I had no idea she was that bad, it’s disappointing cause I thought she was more mature than that. We change our entire weekend for her and she gets all pissy. I guess I’ll have to show her what being rude is next time, so she understands the difference. I feel sorry for James falling for her. He seemed like a nice guy, little quiet but nice.”
Then there was something about pampered princess not being able to handle big boy talk and lucky she hung up the phone. So yes he was mad and had every right to be.
You said your peace on the phone and here is mine. I’m sorry you envisioned your weekend going different, I’m sorry you were disappointed in how it turned out, but that doesn’t give you a right to project that disappointment on us. You are my sister and I love you, so I forgive you for the accusations. With that said we are passed it, it’s your issue to get over. I do still want to do Christmas gifts together, but if that won’t work for you that’s fine too. Talk to you later.
She emailed back and said that she would be doing X-mas gifts alone, I said fine that is your choice, if you change your mind, you are more then welcome to still get the gifts with us. And that at some point we needed to talk about some wedding stuff. No reply. Today I get a text asking about the gift for my mom, I told her that she said she didn't want to do joint gifts and that if she still wanted to she was more than welcome. She said no, I responed that she never answered my question about the wedding. She said that I should just find someone else to help me. I asked if she would be explaining to our mom why she, my only sister and MOH, wasn't helping me with my wedding plans. She then said that my mom has know about all of this for awhile, but has never said anything.
So how do I handle this? My only sister wants no part of helping me and from what I got from my mom she thinks that my FH and I are in the wrong. I need some advice.