So my mother texted me that she has found a MOB dress. And it's cream. Midly irriated, but thanks to this site I just remainded myself of these things:
1) The only people who we can tell what to wear are those in the wedding party.
2) She's a grown woman and can dress herself.
3) No one is going to mistake her for the bride.
4) She's the one that will look bad.
5) Not a hill I want to die on.
Everyone else, however, can't get over this. No one is really surprised she is considering this (my dad, stepmom, friends, etc), but FI in particular is extremely pissed. He wants to talk to her himself. I told him all of the above things, but he's not hearing it. I also firmly believe in "she's my mother, I'll deal with her" and honestly, he's pissing me off more than her at this point. He told me I have a month to talk to her or he's going to. He even half jokingly said she's not invited if she insits on wearing white. I'm sorry, she's my mother and even if she is a PITA, she's still coming to the wedding.
I told him I'm use to being the bigger person when it comes to her and my step-dad (whole other issue) and if I want to spend time with her and have contact with her, this is the type of thing I have to deal with. FI thinks it's not a matter being the bigger person, but that I don't stand up to my mother, which is also partially true. His heart is in the right place, but I really don't think this is one of the situations were I should put my foot down with her.
Sorry this is so long, I guess my round about questions are this: 1) Is there anything I can say to FI to get him to calm down about this? 2) Should I follow my first instincts and let it go or should I say something to her?