Hi, I'm new to The Knot so I'm sorry if I sound like a total dork here, but I'm kind of at a loss. My boyfriend and I have seriously been talking about marriage and stuff for quite a while now, but this post really isn't about that. My parents and I have never really been 'close'. Not that we are distant from each other, but we don't trade secrets and they have never been my shoulder to cry on. They are very suck it up kind of people and often when something is wrong, it is my fault. Not joking here. Anyways, I've always over looked this, but whenever I bring up the topic of a wedding my parents SCOFF at the idea and say that we should just go to the court house (Like they, my brother, and sister all did) and not 'blow' the money for a one day thing. And I could see how they view it that way, but since I was a little girl, like most of you here, I've DREAMED of my wedding. Even now, I can't even go on pintrest without looking at wedding things. So the problem? I really want my parents to be a part of this without treating it like some stupid affair. I know because they don't agree with it, they will not finacially support the wedding at all and if they did, they would want to control EXACTLY how the money was spent, so I'd rather just pay for it on my own. The reason I know is because when my sister got married the first time they did that to her. Anyways, I guess I'm just looking for advice here from women with experience. I am kind of young (21), but this is a very real problem to me. I know I won't be judged here, so I wanted to ask you lovely ladies this question for advice. A little background: I have VERY low self value when it comes to my parents. I'm a first generation college student and I've tried VERY hard to make my parents proud, but they always make it a point to say what I do is never good enough or it's stupid. They've never really encouraged anything I do, unless it's what they want. Has anyone else faced this problem? I could just say screw off and I usually do because I get tired of constantly feeling terrible about myself, but they're my parents and I really want them to be there when I pick out my dress and stuff. I really want them to support me and not mock my choices the whole way. So what do you guys think? Thanks girls!