i need help PLEASE

heatherbaker10

everyone tells me that i have to have the garter and flower toss. I already planned on throwing my flowers but im a very shy person and alot of our guests are married or family and my fiance said we dont have to do the garter if i dont want to. so i wanna get a garter belt but i wanna wear it for him for the Wedding night. not the wedding. Do you think its ok to just have the flower toss and not the garter toss?

danieliza1127

Sure, do whatever you want to do.  We skipped both completely.  These are just "traditions" that are totally optional, not requirements by any means.

tldh

Your wedding.  Your choice.  I've seen women go nuts at the bouquet toss (and saw a cousin dive head first into a ficus to catch one) but I've never seen men who enjoy the garter toss.

[Deleted User]

You don't have to do either of them. If you only want to one that is fine, too. It is your day, you do what you want. Stick to your guns and don't let anyone else talk you into something you don't want.

lisarose7

You don't have to do either.  I personally find both annoying and won't do either (but I don't judge those who do).  If you want to have a bouquet toss, have it.  If you don't want to have a garter toss, don't have it.  You shouldn't have to do anything that makes you uncomfortable.

kristinanddan

We didn't do either. I haven't seen them done in a while, but the few times I have, they seem to kill the party atmosphere. Everyone is up and dancing, then you're stopping the good flow for the tosses. No one seems to miss them.

caseyandlizzie

We are going to skip both. Neither of us have that many single friends, and won't be having children so we see no need in having it. Don't cave into doing things you don't want to do because people are giving you flack about it. It's your wedding and you should do things as you want to do them.

frenchy730

Personally, as a wedding guest, I hate the garter and bouquet throwing parts.  Especially if you take up 10 perfectly good minutes of party-dancing time.

spinner84

Yeah, it's totally cool not to. I went to a wedding with a flower toss and no garter, and never even thought about it.

AmandalovesAl

We aren't doing them...It is always awkward and I don't think ANYONE really likes this tradition. 

EliK10

We are also not doing either.
Instead we are doing the married couple dance.  The bouquet goes to the couple that has been married the longest.

ExpatPumpkin

At 30 and 34, we were among the last of our friends to get married...  There were only a few singles at our wedding.  So the garter and bouquet toss seemed unnecessary and we skipped both.  After all, who would catch them?  So feel free to do one, both, or neither.  Good luck

Theresa626

yes of course it is ok.  Don't do the garter toss. I'ts your wedding. no one will care. The guys never fight over the garter anyway.  

Trishes

You don't HAVE to do anything. Not because "it's your day and you can do what you want" (psht...), but because if it's something you're uncomfortable with, it doesn't make sense to do it just to make others happy - this goes for your wedding, or anything else!

I'm not doing either, but then again no one's given me any trouble about it. I just think it would be terribly awkward to do a garter toss at my wedding.

ustanerd

We're not doing either - both make me uncomfortable, and I often think that they make guests uncomfortable as well. There will be two school-aged girls there - the best man's daughters - and I'm making them their own mini-bouquets... I figure kids that age care way more about these traditions than the grown-ups ever will.

BluValkyrie

we're not doing either; one because I'm not having a flower bouquet (I'm not a flower person) and two because it'll kill the energy of the evening because everything grinds to a hault for the tosses and I want to keep the energy going.

MISSCOURTNEY20

We are not tossing either. I am going to wear a garter and my FH wants to take it off of me. But we are going to have a couple's dance where all the married couples get on the dance floor and dance. The dj will then call off years married and if you haven't been married that long, you will get off of the floor. Of course me and my hubby will be the first off. LOL!! The last couple dancing will get the flowers and the garter. We are thinking that it will be my sister's godparents so that will be very cute.

JennaV26

Yep! I highly doubt anyone would miss it!